Dec 8, 2013 / Community Pool

Community Pool

Community Pool

The Community Pool is for those of you looking for input, whether on post ideas, writing, blog design and layout, or anything else. If you have a post, page, or idea you want to bounce off someone, leave a comment. Your fellow bloggers can then click through and offer input either on your site, or in the comments here (feel free to indicate which you’d prefer).

Read on for the ground rules and to leave a comment . .

  • You’ll get the best feedback if you can be as specific as possible about what you’d like people to respond to or where you’re struggling.
  • Please keep all comments civil and constructive. We’re here to help and support one another, not to beat anyone down.
  • If you haven’t looked at our Commenting Guidelines in a while, now might be a good time.
  • To keep from losing your place in the comment thread while you visit others’ blogs, right-click on a link to open it in a new tab or window.
  • No running on the deck.

Photo by t_a_i_s.

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  1. Hello,
    I have a new sports blog with no upgrades. Eventually, I will be upgrading because I wish to add paid sites, affiliate marketing, etc. I read where I would have to leave this platform but I wish to stay with WordPress. For now, since I am new to blogging and still learning, I wish to keep it simple.

    I invite everyone to come to my blog and tell me what you think. I welcome all criticisms. This is my first blog and I wish to make an income as a Sports Writer. I have followers so I believe I am on the right track and now I wish to take this to the next step.

    For the time being, can I add pics to my blog on a static page?

    Thanks,
    Stacie

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    1. Hi Stacy – I do not follow football, but your blog seems very professional, and your write like a sports writer. The purple and black hurt my eyes, but I finally got it (my football fan love Bronco orange and blue lol). I know it is scary for a girl to do, but I did not see an ABOUT page so I could know more about you. You have a lot of wonderful posts, but it I could not find an easy way to go back to the first one Have you thought about an ARCHIVE page? Keep going girl – Silent.

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    1. I truly enjoyed your description, but I feel that the piece needed more cohesion. The part about the tree and tears at the end seemed to spring out of no where. Could you include language earlier in the piece to subtly create sad tension that climaxes with the tree?

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      1. Thanks for the advice! I totally see where you’re coming from. I was sort of just free writing, and didn’t really think about the overall unity of it. Thanks for letting me know 🙂

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      2. Yeah I understand! I’ve received similar critiques on my writing–to do more than describe. I’m trying to be a more critical reader and writer because of that. Glad I could help!

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  3. Hi! I would really appreciate it if people could check out my blog as well. I would appreciate feedback on the layout; I just don’t know how to make it pretty.
    mcsweeneysrejects.wordpress.com

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    1. Hi Devina – I know how hard it is to ask for help. I have been afraid, too. Somehow, the background hurts my eyes, and the text is lost. Maybe it is the theme or something? Also, I would suggest an ABOUT page (because we want to know more about you, and an ARCHIVE page so we can find all your wonderful post. Happy blogging – Silent

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    1. 1. The grey on peach and burgundy on peach is hard to read. I would choose colors that are easier on the eyes.
      2. Add some pictures!
      3. Categorize your posts so readers can find Haikus, “serious” posts, funny ones, etc.
      4. Love the haikus. I can totally relate as a fellow student.

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    3. You’d benefit from a really critical university English teacher. You have lots of talent but some of your prose is what my 1st year teacher would have called ‘purple’ (too many adjectives) and some of the constructions are awkward. Some words seem to be used without awareness of their built-in connotations.

      Let’s look at a sentence about hummingbirds. “In their pulsating stillness, these fickle creatures seemed just like those moments that people always talk about; the moments when time moves so quickly yet seems like it has stopped.” A great comparison, slightly difficult because it relates the concrete to the abstract. I’d suggest editing it to “In their deceptive appearance of stillness, these pulsating creatures made me think of moments when time moves quickly, yet feels as if it has stopped.” If you’re fond of ‘pulsating stillness,’ you could get away with the less explanatory “In their pulsating stillness, these creatures made me think of moments when time moves quickly, yet feels as if it has stopped.”

      You can’t get away with calling the birds ‘fickle,’ though. That word has an indelible connotation of insincerity, and no one would understand why you are trash-talking the integrity of those nice birds.

      You don’t need to appeal to the crowd with “that people always talk about,” since your experience as an author is sufficient. The cliche about time moving quickly when it seems to move slowly is not so deadly that you need to bring in the crowd to indicate ‘they said it, not me.’

      “So quickly,” as any English teacher would tell you, is a use of the weakest possible type of emphatic. ‘Hand-waving’ is what theater people would call it.

      Using the most elementary sort of formula for similes, “seems like,” twice in the same sentence is awkward. It suggests, perhaps misleadingly, that you aren’t comfortable writing metaphors and similes. In my rewrite, all of the ‘seems’ have been unzipped from the sentence. To use ‘feels as if’ rather than ‘feels like’ is just one of those touches that says, “Even though I want to seem like an author who’s in touch with the people, I know I’m writing literary English now and not talking to my friend on my mobile phone.” It’s a class marker, and you can live without it, but most authors pay some heed to looking like masters of their language. If you plan to write everything in street dialogue, make it obvious. There are no ‘pulsating stillnesses’ in street dialogue unless the speaker is on an acid trip. English is an extremely class-conscious language. Know the literary level you’re pitching for.

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    1. Your friends post was spot on–Amy Poheler gave some great advice about friendships that I think fits right in with what you were saying…She said that if they don’t make you feel included and a part of something good, tell them to beat it. And yes, boys and girls can be friends. I’m in college an my roommate next year is my best friend and a boy.

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      2. Well I read stuff on your blog the last time we had a community pool. Keep writing about the moments that matter to you and make sure explain why they are so important. You can also give yourself challenges sometimes…maybe like “This week I am going to draw a cartoon and post it,” even if you don’t consider yourself an artist. Or maybe “I am going to describe my favorite food and really push myself to use as many adjectives/senses as possible.” I know you are young, so I think the best thing would be to keep writing and reading. A lot.

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      3. Oh….that’s a cool idea. I like it…..also anything that would help me drive attention to my blog…..please!!! I really would like feedback.

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      4. I would keep telling your family and friends about it. I don’t know if you are too young to have a facebook or not, but I link my blog to my facebook. Also, keep asking for more critiques on Community Pools. (I get most of my views that way tehe). But remember, the only person you actually have to write for is yourself. If you like it, that is enough.

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      5. Thanks for the help…..I really appreciate it. Also…..yeah, I am a little too young to have FaceBook. So….anything else I should know about blogging???

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      6. Hahaha–my blog only has four posts so far. I’m still a newbie too. I think you should just keep trying to be creative, trying new things with words as you are growing up and figuring out the person you want to be.

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      7. Ok….thanks so much….I will keep doing that. Any feedback you need??? Also….I’m always here so if you never need help….come over and ask.

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      8. well I’m over at emilycmyers.wordpress.com. I am just trying to relate the observations I make to the world. But you are more than welcome to look at it and tell me what you think. I kinda want your opinion, mostly because your blog sounds like you and I had a lot in common when I was your age (I’m now 20 years old). I’m curious what my younger self would think of me.

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      9. Wow…..I just looked at your blog. It is amazing. OMG, I just got an idea….I should keep a notebook with all the observations I make in life….maybe in the end I can write a post all about it, thank you for the inspiration. I really like your latest post All or Nothing. I’m curious to know what you had in mind when you wrote that post….what message were you trying to get out??? PLEASE REPLY ASAP.

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      10. Actually yeah, I keep old journals and I write down all the odd things that happen. And I reread them, years after the fact. I also keep a list of potential topics on my computer, and a lot of them have simply taken years of life experience for things to line up and be something meaningful.

        As for all or nothing, its kinda a funny story. I did have an art teacher named Mrs. Kranz who taught me about mixing colors. I did have a high school physics teacher who taught me about light and wavelengths and all that. But one day, in my senior year of high school, my friends and I just wanted to be silly and have a “Rainbow Friday.” So each of us picked a different color, and I had black because that was my favorite color. And it was when all of us had dressed up in our favorite color that it just occurred to me that black is somehow all or nothing at the same time. So then I get to my sophomore year of college, and I hear that lyric from Macklemore. And I was like, well I’m an all or nothing kind of person. And I just kinda went “Huh.” And after that, everything just synthesized.

        So the message is that color isn’t actually pigments or wavelengths of light. It’s your aura that comes from within. The difference is that I talk about people having auras in a completely new way, not a cliched one.

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      11. Wow….that’s so cool. I have a blog notebook……full of ideas for blogging….I have around 500 at the moment…me and my best friend always share ideas and we run a writing club at school. I wanted to know…..you inspire me a lot and I love the meaning of the All or Nothing Post so I wanted to ask is there any chance you could post a guest blog post on my blog please???

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      12. Well I would have to think of a good topic. I would probably want to re-read one of my old diaries and just see what happens. I can’t force any of my writing topics, if that makes sense. I won’t make any promises, but if I come up with something I will let you know. I followed your blog, so I can find you again. 🙂

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      13. Ok….thanks…..so much. Ok…..please tell me when you do…..BTW, this benefits me and you…..You because you’ll get more followers and I have 43 followers……so be sure to consider that. I would be really happy if you could so please let me know…..DESPERATE!

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    1. Your post is timely, and your points are very clear. I can’t believe they killed off hershel either. And, if you are going to kill off Brian, at least do something epic around it. I always say, you can kill the characters, but NOT the dog. The fact that I want to share this with you–a perfect stranger, means you are doing something right with your Blog. Cheers!

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    2. I enjoyed reading your post. Even though I haven’t watched any of the shows you mentioned (except Family Guy), you have written it in a way that anyone can understand it.

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  9. I’ve decided to start a blog after years of contemplating if I should. I would love some feedback on the site! I’ve decided to go with a mix between a fashion and everyday life blog. I would really appreciate the feedback 🙂

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    1. Don’t just tell us what you are wearing, tell us why you are wearing it. There is that one quote–I forget who said it–“When a woman says she has nothing to wear she really means she has nothing to wear for who she is supposed to be that day.” Give me more context to your thoughts.

      –Fellow fashion lover

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  11. Sci-fi ideas blog

    I’m writing a blog in the voice of a fictional character, the 17-year-old narrator of a geek sci-fi book I wrote. In this story line, he lives on another planet, after being rescued from a suicide attempt on Earth. Most of his blog comments are about interesting or inspiring philosophical insights he has encountered on his new planet. The book itself has a whole adventure plot line, but I’m not attempting to post the whole thing on the blog.

    I can see that the most successful WordPress blogs feature first-person commentary on everyday life, and I’m not aiming for that niche at all. For all those people who like reading about ideas as ideas, though – my fellow geeks, nerds, or whatever – do you find my format ‘too far off the beaten track’ or otherwise not credible? Would more attention to visual design make a big difference? Any other suggestions or critique?

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  12. This is the first time I’ve read the “Community Pool” post and I am thankful that I did. It is inspirational checking out these new blogs that I haven’t yet seen… and also reading the thoughtful comments and suggestions of the veteran bloggers. That being said, do y’all have any suggestions for me. I usually write in a long/bureaucratic style, so I am trying to stretch my writing abilities by writing in a completely different style. Sometimes it is a little too choppy, but I want it to be honest and direct. It is: http://gayinlosangeles.wordpress.com/

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    1. I LOVE THIS. I love the clipped one-line paragraphs. Very different from how I write. If anything though, I feel like your posts about dates or different guys need just a few more lines. Drive home how you really feel and maybe try invigorating your adjective choice. I am just left wanting a tiny bit more.

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      1. Thank you! I appreciate this….. I’m writing in a texting format. I consciously and constantly try to eliminate extra words. I was keeping it short to promote comments, but acknowledge that the brevity might be extreme at times. I didn’t want to give too much away. I’ll add more emotion and details (while retaining the clipped style).

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      2. Yes! Push yourself to make every word as impactful as possible. I think this is a style that works for my vision of “LA dating,” as someone who has never been there and is from the Midwest.

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      6. HAHAHA you describe my life! I always detail new romantic prospects that aren’t even founded in reality to my friends and I get all these butterflies. And then there is this moment when I’m like “you are studying abroad right now, so much can change in the next two months before you get back.” But I’m still weirdly giddy.

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      7. I’m heading out on a date right now… going to a farmers market and then some neighborhood strolling if I want to learn more about the guy. We will see.

        I’m just deciding what to wear. Casual, non-hipster.

        Sooo, if you could please take a look at this post. I was more than irritated when I wrote it, but does it have type of details you think folks would enjoy?
        http://gayinlosangeles.wordpress.com/2013/11/09/dont-lick-my-lungs-on-the-first-date/?relatedposts_exclude=154

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      8. I think you could tighten it up even a bit more. I think a few of the lines are repetitive of each other, which takes away from the suspense you are building with this awful date story. But yes, I would read more of this.

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      9. I posted that one before I settled in to the new format. I see what you mean though. I need to find a happy medium between the two. And improve my adj.

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      1. I’d like to add photos, but it compromises the anonymous nature of the blog. I cannot use a photo from the blog in any other place. You can just do a Google URL image search and they’ll be linked together. I like the idea though.

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  15. My blog is related to supporting other blogs etc.. I LOVE LOVE meeting new people and spying and most importantly having an open journal on my thoughts as writing is a passion. Do you all think I am on the right track.

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  16. Hey guys, just started my blog (literally within the past 3 days) and I’m looking for feedback, not fussed for what you comment on but any feedback I would greatly appreciate!

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    1. I just started my blog this past week as well. So I am right there with you when it comes with feedback and coaching.
      I’ll give feedback on your blog and you can give me feedback on mine.

      I really the way you started off your blog. The posts are great. I haven’t really started on writing any posts yet… I’m not sure what direction to take.
      For me, I would reccommend you change the colors on your website… I’m not a fan of the black background. I can live with the teal, more than the black background.

      Just some friendly advice 🙂

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      1. Thanks for the feedback, haven’t really decided which theme I’m going for yet, the black and teal is just a stop for just now until I find one that suits me!

        Really liked the first post, although I wasn’t really sure what it was about, but that might just be me. Having a clear and definitive idea in each post will make it a lot easier to read for all your readers!

        Hope this is of help!

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      2. Lol, it was just a bunch of rambling, really. I was just writing what came to mind.

        I will definitely keep your suggestion in mind. It sounds like each post should follow a topic, vs go on rambling. Thanks for the help.

        Good Luck!

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  18. Hi. I would love feedback on my blog and any suggestions for new articles or posts that I should create to keep it consistent yet fresh?
    Thank you in advance xx

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      1. Hi, thanks for taking a look and your suggestions. I’m actually on my second pregnancy but those are still brilliant ideas thanks so much xx

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    1. Go into your classic black dashboard (not the blue one) and in the left hand margin click “Pages.” Then find your About page and click on that link. You should be able to edit it then.

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  26. Hello everyone. I started writing this blog, I’m looking for advice on writing. Topics. I use my blog as a journal of travelling thought. Does anyone else do the same? Is this a successful model for a blog?

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    1. Hey!
      Travelling thought is very similar to the way I am blogging except I am blogging about experiences and what I thought at the time. I think, at least for me it is a great way to relax a little and allows me to reflect on life itself without the extra stress of other people close to you critically judging. At the end of the day, it is your blog. If you are comfortable and happy with what you have written, post it.

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      1. Couldn’t agree more with you. Except that I may be more of a rambler than a deep thinker on my blog. It is interesting to see the various types of writing !

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  27. Hi!
    I have just started blogging 9hrs ago and my first blog is an introduction about myself and my teenage years which I hope some can relate to. I would love to know what everyone thinks, is there anything I should change for future blogs and what sort of thing would you like to read me blog about?
    http://amysholmes.wordpress.com

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  29. #TanishaHamil
    Hey everyone I recently wrote a blog post on parenting! I would like opinions on my writing. I’m new to this but I love to do it and any opinions, ideas would help! Thanks in advance!

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  30. Hey guys, I’ve recently started blogging about my experience with martial art and starting to jog again, sounds a bit erm hypocritical with the word cookies in my title but no food post .. YET!

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