I would ask them to tell about some childhood memory, that is, to write it as carelessly, recklessly, fast and sloppily as possible on paper. […] Their only effort became to tell spontaneously, impulsively, what they remembered.

And I asked for childhood experiences for this reason. A child experiences things from his true self (creatively) and not from his theoretical self (dutifully), i.e. the self he thinks he ought to be. That is why childhood memories are the most living and sparkling and true.

From If You Want to Write

I often feel a lot of anxiety before publishing a post. Why? Mostly because I know that I have blog subscribers and they will (hopefully) be reading the post that I’m agonizing over. I worry about my tone, whether or not what I’m saying could be misunderstood, and if I will offend anyone. It’s embarrassing to admit that I can feel that self-conscious when writing, but it’s true.

This kind of over-thinking and self-censorship completely hinders my ability to write well. In the words of Brenda Ueland, the woman who wrote If You Want To Write, I’m writing from my “theoretical self,” the adult self that worries about what other people think. Good writing is honest, not contrived or safe.

Do you ever feel like you’re holding yourself back? If so, how do you work past it? If you’d like, I encourage you to give Ueland’s writing exercise a shot: pick a childhood memory and write freely. After you’ve written it, think back to how you felt and ask if the process felt any different from how you usually feel when typing away. If you make your childhood memory public, be sure to share it in the comments. (That’s where I’ll be sharing mine and I’d love to see yours!)

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  2. Thank you Erica. I will base 2012 writing on this. Thanks for giving me the permission to write honestly.

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  5. I sometimes worry that perhaps I’m being a bit too insensitive – that my blunt thoughts will offend so I stay away from certain topics. I tend to have foot-and-mouth syndrome already in real life – try to avoid that in ‘virtual world.’ Writing stories however I don’t have this problem as the feedback isn’t as instant as it is on a blog.
    Having said that, I think my blog post today about reverting back to a child and doing what I want rather than what I should applies nicely to today’s topic. http://storieswritingadventure.wordpress.com/

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  7. Well said! I was talking to Mum about this a few weeks ago – when I told her I feel like I’m trying to play it safe, or copy other people’s blog style of writing, she replied, “well, don’t.” It sounds a little brutal, but it was an ‘oh yeah!’ kind of moment that has helped a lot!

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  8. What a great post.
    Very well written! If you have anxiety before every post, what hope does everyone else have!!!

    Also, this line that your wrote “That is why childhood memories are the most living and sparkling and true.”
    I LOVE IT…..

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  10. To all the bloggers that have post to this post about the childhood memories, I have enjoyed all the ones that I read. Now, you have encourage me to share a memorie that I was not particularyly proud of, is when my siblings would call me names as a child, I hated this. They would call me names such as “tissue paper”, I hated to be called names as a child, and I hate name calling to this day. Thanks for the opportunity to share. Wanda Griffith

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  11. Thanx to invite us in this way… Apparently i share the problem of writing on my blog or in my facebook with a lot of people here! How to be honnest in writing without hurting or chocking anybody? That’s a good question… And when it’s talking about personnal stuffs, where begin and end the privacy?
    Going to try to write something about my chilhood. Difficult for me in english because i don’t speak well, i’m french…
    I remember something special when i was a little girl: i was afraid by black color and white hair… Why? I can’t say. I don’t know. When i saw one of those things, i started to cry like a baby… But i was fascinated and even in crying, i tried to see the thing of my fear… It could be a black hat, a black radish, my father’s black socks, a camera or a venerable old lady with all her hair white… When i cried like that, my poor mother didn’t know what to do with me to make me stop! Thank goodness It has changed! Today however, my clothes are all black… 😎
    Forgive-me please for my bad english… See you soon all of you here!
    LouYsa

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  17. My posts are perfect the moment I hit the Publish button and are revered around the world. I have never in my entire life felt anxious about a single word I’ve put down…OK I can wake up now.

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  18. A child experiences things from his true self (creatively) and not from his theoretical self (dutifully)..

    Love this. Even though we’ve all heard it before, it’s still a good reminder every time we hear it. Children don’t have a filter. Adults do. And it does hold us back.

    I think it’s perfectly natural to feel self-conscious about writing, because writing is one of the most basic, rawest, most vulnerable ways of putting yourself out there.

    As for me, I feel that my bigger problem is not holding myself back when I write, but holding myself back from writing.

    Good luck to you all and here’s hoping 2012 is a very successful year of writing for you!

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  21. When I publish my posts, the only thing I really worry about is ANYONE really reading my posts? I do have some things I absolutely will not write about.. that includes any of the foibles that I see at work.. After all what you write is always out there even if you post disclaimers that “all opinions are my own and not of my employer!’ Loved your posting

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  22. I don’t really suffer of self conscious writing, for me the problem is writing and posting and then feeling like I should have held back a bit more, but nice post!

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  25. Agree, posting on blogs is like sharing a part of your life with the whole world, like standing on top of the tallest building and shouting your name out loud. The easy part about writing from your memories is the words just flow out in a steady stream, a little change here, a minor correction there and you have a publishable post ready. The problem with writing imaginary stuff is, first of all you need to have a vivid imagination, and second what comes out of it should be interesting for others as well. Will go with the first option and stick to writing down about old memories, it is easier!!

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