Just in case you hadn't noticed...

Who are friends? 

1. The ones that try their hardest to be there when you need them the most?
2. The ones that give you a shoulder to lean on and cry?
3. The ones that will send you smses to ask "how are you?" Despite the answer is always 'Fine'
4. The ones that listen to your problems in full length without cutting you off.
5. The ones that give you real advice and heartfelt words and not acting like they have been in your shoes cause they really haven't.
6. The ones that will not judge you and try to change you and let you be you.

I received none of these treatments. I do not need them too, Im learning to be solitude independent. Instead, they called out my name only when they needed my help. Being ignorant yet trying to put up a understood front, fakers. While the closest friends love to boycott. It's alright, I have my soft toy. It's with me whenever im down.

They don't text or call. Sometimes I wondered if I really had made a different in their lives.

This is an older story (by a couple of weeks) but I felt it was just too sweet not to share! So here it is:

One afternoon the baby was kicking up a storm so I called my oldest daughter over to try and feel him/her. We've worked hard at helping my daughter understand an honest and appropriate way of how babies are born. So, as she had her hands on my belly, not really knowing what to expect, she suddenly felt a big swift kick against her hand.  Her eyes grew big as she began to get very excited saying:

Dear daughter: "Mama! Mama! He's kicking! He wants to come out! PUSH! PUSH HIM OUT!"

HAHA! It was the most adorable, sweetest, most innocent little reaction. Bless her heart.

Good thing I have meticulous sisters whom I share this passion with, and who also infected me of this fad I thought was vain and nonsensical. If that's true, call me vain and nonsensical. But there are also good virtues needed in this task. It takes patience and endurance to polish one's nails, even on the part of the one who's being nail polished.

Currently, my left toenails are painted frosted green, and my right toenails scream of fuchsia. And what about my fingernails? Oh, they are done in teal with random yellow speckles.

But I still prefer to keep my nails short. I can't work normally with longer than average nails getting in the way. I can't type with ease, I can't wash the dishes, heck, I can't even pick my nose, which is by the way, a pet peeve that I do in public.

If I am capable of distracting people by flashing and flickering my flamboyant fingernails, perhaps I would be able to control myself from doing such disgusting things.

Plagiarism for Instructors & Students: How can you avoid using plagiarism as a student?
            For Instructors, or someone who is simply teaching another, the best way to avoid plagiarism is, basically, to know what plagiarism is. If the Instructor has complete knowledge of it fully well then it is most likely that plagiarism will not happen. For Students, the main problem why some do plagiarize is because their due date is closer than expected, the work they found is "better worded" than theirs, they do not know how to cite their work properly, or they've just gotten lazy. The best way for Students to avoid plagiarism is if the Instructor were to teach them how to properly cite their sources or to simply teach them how to interpret and analyze the sources that they've found so the Students wouldn't simply "phrase it into their own words".

What is citation? When and why do you cite?
            A citation is simply something that tells the reader, or the marker, where the writer had gotten their work and/or answers from. One would place the citation at the end of the document and/or work, anywhere as long as it is seen. One would cite their work whenever one would find and ‘borrow' an idea or thought. Citation is to simply credit the other person's work and ideas, and also to avoid plagiarizing. Another reason would be so that readers could find out the source if they were curious and wished to find out more information on the subject they are reading. It also tells the readers and/or Instructor how much information had been found and how much research had been done for the work.

How can technology assist students and teachers from using plagiarism?
            Technology can assist students and teachers from plagiarizing because the internet makes life so much more easier. Say if a student were to just copy and paste, the teacher could just search one sentence from the work and find the original document for it. So then, if students were to know that - and they obviously would - it would make them more likely not to plagiarize because the teacher could easily find out how they got their work. Also, from what I've been told, in some universities and colleges a machine had been put in that scans the document and searches every database and archive to check if the work had been taken from somewhere else. Yes, it would put a lot of pressure on the students to think up their own ideas but at least they're thinking.

What Detection Tools are used in the academic community to avoid this problem?
            I think it was one of my teachers from before or a friend of mine, I can't remember any other details, who told me about that machine that they had put into some universities and/or colleges. The professor would place just one page from the essay or work the student did into the machine and the machine would start scanning. It would look through every known database and archive with lightning fast speed to check if the work had been taken from somewhere or someone else. I don't know if this is true or not, but it seems both ‘cool' and a little scary.

Work Cited

Plagiarism.org
http://www.plagiarism.org/

Dictionary.com
http://dictionary.reference.com/

therefore, my goal today is 780c.
if i exercise, i can up that to 850c.

so we'll see how the day goes =]

goals:
under 780c
over 2L water
no b/p
write either one page of the novel,
or a new page in your journal.

wish me luck!

Det blev ingen skola för mig idag. Försov mig något förskräckligt. Dessutom hade jag bara två lektioner idag. Matte, som vi inte har mycket kvar av eftersom vi redan skrivit klart kursproven och biologi. Som jag hatar. Biologi A är en fruktansvärt onödig kurs som utan problem skulle kunna slås ihop med Naturkunskap. Biologi B är i alla fall interessant. Den kursen fokuserar mer på hur saker och ting i kroppen fungerar. Fast min kära hagga till lärarinna kan säkert göra det mindre interessant hon med. Att lyssna på fåglar and such när man borde lära sig om hur ekosystem fungerar (som inte är helt omöjligt att göra interessant) är inte precis uppmuntrande.

Sitter och lyssnar på ES Posthumus senaste platta. Den är man tyvärr tvungen att ladda ner illegalt, eftersom det inte finns speciellt många butiker som för den. Hur som helst är den mysigast i världen. Har även ramlat in på indie-rock lite grann... Vad jag lyssnar på har inte mycket med genre att göra, utan om det är bra musik eller inte. Av någon anledning så är det svårare att hitta musik som man lyssnar på för musikens skull inom vissa områden... Oförklarligt, eller hur?

Ska försöka formulera ett PM (som inte står för personligt medelande jävla noobs, utan promemoria) inför ett tal i svenskan. Sedan är jag klar med även den kursen. Mums. Jag vet exakt vad jag ska skriva om, det går bara lite trögt att börja. Som några kanske märkt så skriver jag inte ett PM just nu, utan ett blogginlägg. PHAIL för mig.

Jag gillar att skriva, men svenska i skolan så gör man inte så mycket roliga saker. Jag föredrar att skriva noveller (kanske för att jag har drygt tjugo i huvet som bara väntar på att få hoppa ut och säga hej) över att skriva debattartiklar i ämnen som är fantastiskt ointeressanta.

Nej, nu ska jag faktiskt se till att göra nytta. Ta dig i kragen kvinna! D<

We had a hectic day today. I have learnt much, and I believe you have, too. Sometimes situations are best observed by a third person, because as far as I could tell, we were too people like ants on a hot fry-pan, arguing over the tiny little truths we manage to derive from each other.

Boys are silly and I still believe that; sometimes it takes the girl ages to realize because in the beginning she always assumes she was the wrong one. First humble, then we find ourselves blocking the very doorway.

Another break-up? Yes, and I still managed to get you talking for 4 hours. The reasons you assumed for the break-up were not really the reasons at all. They were hindering what were hidden underneath by our blind sights and fears. Now when you were once so certain about your decision, I believe you are standing again in the grey area.

These are silly things; and sometimes we are silly kids. In our twenties we can still sulk and be ecstatic just like five-year-olds. But I realized those important things about a relationship today. I can't say it's universal, but I believe they are basic. Do not break up with me; everyone will believe it is unfair.

But whatever happens I hope you are happier. Last time we broke up it was for the worse, and you said you were more sad. Since the overall atmosphere did not change I believe the reasons this time round are more or less the same.

We all try not to make the same mistake twice, don't we?

I have faith in you, in this relationship, in human beings. We all have flaws, we make mistakes, learn from them, keep going for the wonderful things. But for once, (excuse the language), stop poking your d*** in a new hole everytime something happens - if a relationship is what you want.

xx R.

These pages were made in March and April and are just a sample of how I use this journal. It's a mix of exploring art and ideas, of capturing the moment, lists, quick sketches and recording daily events and news. So far, I haven't used this one whilst I'm out - it's heavier than my old journal and not so easy to pop into a bag. But I still bring back ephemera to paste in and write about outings. I used to fret that these should be written about on the day they happened but I have relaxed those rules - I'm often too tired or unable to fit in the time. So now I write and sketch when I can, and find that it's much more effective than sticking to a rigid regime. For me, anyway, it works :)

I realised something a while ago that has aggrivated me to the point that I said, "Gosh, I must blog about this."

James Mitchell and I were talking about placement, a mixture of musing and grumbling about what is expected of us (just the usual brain melting banter) when I brought up a friend of mine, Adam Jaggard, I was making a comparison with his placement because it has turned out worse than ours and it makes you feel better knowing other people are more fucked over then you are. Hah.

As far as I know, and I may be mistelling this so I'll have to ask, he wanted to go back to a web development company that he had previously worked for (or currently works for, unsure), who would have paid him for the work on top of calling it his placement. Win win, no? No, because he wasn't allowed to go to that studio. Instead, he was forced to go to (London?) and work on some random guys website, not a 'company' but a guy. A singular guy.

Without context, that little emphasis doesn't really mean much to you, but I am going to elaborate so bear with me.

Last week I was asking if I could change my placement, as I wanted to use the work that I am doing for my aunt (paid, by the way) as the 10 days worth of placement. It is a slightly awkward situation, as we are related which means I don't want to cause any problems with the University of Glasgow who are her funding. I didn't want anyone thinking it was family related favouritism or that anything was unfair about the job. I wanted to get off my placement with Somnia, as good as they've been to me, so I could get on with the other website work, and frankly, earn some money.

Phil Beards, my course administrator, made a very good point against me running off and doing this in that he doesn't want me to mess about the people at Somnia (and neither did I, but I wanted to put myself first - I'm the one in debt(you selfish prick(that's the way to be brother))) but when I spoke to them about it they were nothing but encouraging. I think they understand my reasoning well, and they seemed to want to push harder then I did... They did seem quite happy to get rid of me for some reason...

Anyway, it kind of made Phil's point inconsequential, especially to me, so I talked to him about it but he was still against it. When I pushed, he made the argument that it is not really work experience, because it's independant work, contracted... You know, work for just one person. Erm.

Now, I don't have a problem with Phil using it as an argument to not go on placement, because you can (almost) understand why (and he's quite often single minded to the point of ignorance), but I object rather strongly when you compare my and Jaggard's situations. He's said almost the complete opposite in both cases, where it seems he's just making trivial points to keep us away from people that we're already connected to (is that really important? it's not like the company we go to can, or even need to be ASTRONOMICALLY IMPARTIAL)... Quite possibly, he is being awkward to keep us away from making some money, because money is the root of all evil and Phil is secretly a herculean warrior of justice, sent to save the students of the Arts Institute from corruption and, as with most Art based universities, exessive vanity.

I'm not sure whether it was his original intention, or if he's just a bloody hypocrite who's poor arguing skills have been covering up his close-to-blaze attitude towards tackling the unknown and unsure. If he's not certain about it, fuck it, no, we're not going to do it. Being normal and boring is more safe.

Regardless, I did not want to force the matter with Phil and in the end if I don't end up upsetting the guys (and girls) over here at Somnia. Everything is fine, well, I hope it's all good with Jaggard. In the end, I don't have to go near London and I can't tell you how pleased I am for that!

- teh Beard

edit: This was the 100th post on Uberbeard! Hooraah! I managed to miss it and just whine my arse off, quite fitting really!

Birth

1945. Ian McLagan (The Small Faces) born in London, England.

On Tour

1974. Brian May (Queen) collapses in New York during the band's tour as support to Mott The Hoople. At first it is assumed to be exhaustion and he is ordered to rest before the next gig in Boston. By the time he gets to Boston, he is so ill a doctor is called and he is found to be suffering from hepatitis. The tour is cancelled and Brian is flown home.

In Custody

1995. Shed Seven are cautioned by police after throwing Alan Leach's drums out of their van onto the motorway en-route for tonight's gig at The Garage in Glasgow. His snare drum is never recovered.

In Hospital

2000. Rod Stewart undergoes thyroid surgery in Los Angeles. The operation removed a nodule from the singer's thyroid gland that had been spotted during a routine CAT scan. Thankfully, the nodule was benign.

On Television

1963. Bob Dylan rehearses four songs for tonight's live broadcast of "The Ed Sullivan Show". When the show's Program Practices Editor, Stowe Phelps, asks him to drop "Talking John Birch Society Blues" from his set, he refuses and leaves. He's dropped from the show but the programme's censorship of the song does much to cement Dylan's position in the protest movement. It's long been said that some of the show's production staff were members of the John Birch Society but this has never been confirmed. Izzy Young of the Folklore Centre publishes a xeroxed broadsheet listing all the words to the song which he distributes freely to protest against the programme's actions.

Here's something that did get broadcast:

1983. Rockpalast (WDR, West Germany) Tears For Fears (Sartory-Säle Köln). Here they are with their original version of "Mad World".

Death

2003. Kim Turner dies of cancer. He started as drummer with Cat Iron, a Miles Copeland managed band, before working with Andy Fraser (ex-Free).In the late seventies he again worked with Miles Copeland, this time as a road manager and sound engineer for The Police. In the late eighties he worked as executive producer for Wishbone Ash, with whom his brother Martin played.

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“From heaven the Lord looks down and sees all mankind; from His dwelling-place He watches all who live on earth - He who forms the hearts of all, who considers everything they do” – Psalm 33:13-15.

How awesome is God that He sees each of one of us. That He considers each one of our actions. That He keeps up with us, and knows us so intimately.

Sometimes it makes me feel uncomfortable to think about it because I don’t think I am giving Him a good show. Maybe I’m time-wasting, maybe I’m holding on to an attitude that is wrong. Lots of things.

Other times I feel in awe of this amazing God who loves me enough to be that interested. It gives me all the motivation I need to try and make Him smile with all that I do and say and think.

How does it make you feel to know that God is watching over you so intimately? For me, for today at least, I am going to try and give Him a good show :).

Wife and kids is what he says he wants. He is young still, but he said in his culture it marriage and children is somthing that is very desirable at such times.

He invited me to his wedding all the way in Jordan. hahah its very far away, I live in the United States. I told him yes i would come.:)) he is very far, I would like someone with me, I don't think going to Jordan alone is wise for me. I am lost going down by street. I will though figure it all out.

He shares with me all that makes him happy and sad. As a friend to Ahmed, He is getting what he wants, i only hope his fiancee is all that he desires and much more.

Trust is one day I would like to marry as well. I am certainly now not in any position to marry, but one day.

Okay, I drive a van, first of all. It's like, pretty modern, probably from like, 2000 or 2001, but the goal here is to do everything in your power to imagine that it's not only very old, but preferably not a van at all. Let's try something more along the lines of a like, topless jeep. Is that what it's called? The kind of jeep that one dude drives through the shitty, tribal part of Africa in that movie about the Coke bottle. Actually, any shitty-ass car you might find in that part of Africa will work, so just visualize one. You will probably need to roll down the windows for this one. Nextly, imagine that it's overcast. Like, extremely overcast. Like, you can smell the rain about to come down and make it Jurassic Park in the daytime. And now, make sure you're going fast. Fast so you're cold and your nose is dry and it smells like blood; blissfully fast. Do you feel the lust for life yet? Maybe try imagining a damp, grassy hillside to your right, and a huge drop-off to your left where you can see the harbor in the distance, and houses in the foreground. Listen to your engine. Blast some Tropicalia and sing along. Imagine the quality of your ride to be as dirty, cold, wet, and good as possible. Remain receptive to the beauty of nature. This'll be awesome.

Enjoy. I hope that worked.

For me it is logical to be tolerant of others. It shouldn't be something that is "at their discretion" - because who isn't without flaws? And thus who shouldn't be tolerable of others?
That applies to close relationships - familial or romantic - because that is what closeness are for. Without patience, communication and understanding, the relationship isn't worth having.

It is the sweetness that makes the bitter fruit worth of taking.

Saying that, I know to distinguish the difference between one's mistakes & one's characteristic. If gambling is continuous, it is a characteristic; if it was one-off and even if they lose all their money, the partner we have chosen should deserve a chance to be forgiven & learn from it.

* * * *

I see things too much in black & white because I dislike compromises. In teamwork it is effective, but not when it comes to things related to morality and values.

On Mother's Day, I returned to my parent's home only to find my mother crying. My dad has been fed up with me not contacting them while living away, and said that if I do not become more like my family members, I will pretty much be disowned as a daughter.
Coming to choose to change my life or keep the parent-child linkage, I didn't immediately jump to the latter. For me, my past which was filled with dad and mum's advices had been worse than the life I have chosen for myself. Moving out of home teaches me countless street-smart lessons that are more priceless than academic information.

But who would ask a child to give up seeing their mother forever? And what child would choose that voluntarily?
I did not want to compromise with their way of doing things, no matter what. For that, I would rather lose in grief instead of making my life second-best to what I could possibly make it.

That is where I am stubborn. That is where I see things in black & white.
I don't deem compromise in that situation as "best."

In the end, my parents did leave me alone. They realized that differences, even amongst you and your child, including culture and gender, need to be respected. I cannot be all that they want, and the world is not perfect.

* * * *

Despite that little triumph over people 30 years older than me, I think I still take the issue with M to heart too closely.
It made me think that perhaps I am not normal enough, and he isn't a happy boy to begin with either.
I am falling into my own trap that I have warned others: two halves cannot be in a happy relationship.

But thinking of the intolerance issue, if two people are slightly broken but both have the determination to continuously be better selves & strive for a united perfection, perhaps those relationships will work after all.

This room had a very interesting tangle of bed springs and several walls of painted and distressed canvas.  I was really impressed to find common items used as recycled art installations.  I guess I just don't expect to find too many main stream hotels, or businesses for that matter, supporting this kind of thing - I'm pleased to change my opinion.

Enjoy the photos, and take a look, this is the Villager in Lincoln, Nebraska.