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That God for incorrect first impressions

natespeak — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 17:17:08 +0000

This column isn’t so much about second chances as it is about incorrect first impressions and how sometimes they play to our favor. This column is more of a story I was reminded of after recently being pulled over for speeding … past a Maricopa Sheriff … at 86 miles per hour.
It was approximately three years ago. I was just hired on as a feature writer at a local newspaper and was covering my second “gig” in a nearby town. Being a journalist was actually my full-time job, but I still worked part-time as a teacher at a boarding school. With two often conflicting schedules I found myself needing to do many of my interviews with people in the evening. That’s the way it was for this gig.
The subject of the interview was a teenager who had overcome an incredible methamphetamine addiction and conviction for concealed weapons violations who had turned over a new leaf and wanted to share his story of recovery. He lived in a nearby town, but it was still far away enough, and I was disorganized enough, that I was running late. Making me run further behind was my insistence to pack up, not only notes and a recorder necessary for the interview, but my laundry. I was a bachelor and figured I would stop by a Laundromat on my way home.
Finally, 20 minutes from needing to be at my destination 25 miles away, I took off down my bumpy gravel road that was determined to slow my 1987 Toyota four-cylinder 4X4 piece of [expletive deleted] to a crawl. By the time I hit the highway I wanted to get out and push but luckily ran into a downhill that gave me enough speed to kick it into hyper drive.
At this time, let me emphasize to you the lack of organization and responsibility in my life. Yes, I worked an average of 65 hours a week, but I normally wore the same clothes over and over again, spraying them with Febreeze. My diet consisted of soda, beer and Taco Bell, I talked to my dog as if she were my psychiatrist and I never paid bills on the theory, “they can’t kill me.”
As far as caring for my property, my dog lived better than I did, but my truck suffered from neglect. I don’t know how many miles I had on it without an oil change and the last time it saw a good cleaning was during monsoon season. I did change the tags on my truck; unfortunately, the tags were put on the new license plate I received which was still sitting on the floor of my cab.
Back to my race with time.
I was approximately 10 miles down the home stretch and I thought I may actually make it on time. Up over a hill and down the next. Over a hill and down the next. Over a hill and ... why is that car turning around?
As the highway patrolman approached my truck I thought up every excuse I’ve ever used for speeding.
“I was on the way to the hospital.”
“My speedometer has been acting a bit whacky.”
“I had to use the restroom and wasn’t about to urinate out in the desert with coyotes.”
I settled with the fact I may not need to use an excuse other than I’m running late for work. A yellow legal pad and voice recorder sat next to me on the bench seat that screamed “newspaper reporter, urgency.”
When he arrived at my window I already had it rolled down.
“Sorry, officer, I’m on my way to an interview and I’m running late. No excuses.”
Before he could ask for my license and registration I held it out in fingertips. Before he could question me about my license plates I nonchalantly reached down to grab my new plate and handed it over, admitting to my laziness. How awkward it must have been for him to have carried all of that back to his cruiser, a license plate, license and registration all stacked nice and neat, especially when he didn’t have the chance to point out my faults.
While the officer checked on me through dispatch I made a call on my cell phone to tell the family of my subject I was running late. Coverage was so poor where I was I’m sure all they heard was, “Sorry … late … cops … over.”
As the trooper let me off with a warning, despite doing 21 miles an hour over the speed limit, all I could think about was how much I was going to enjoy my new job and the perks that came with it. Being able to attend certain functions for free as long as I interviewed someone, and now having power over police? With the pay I was receiving, I needed these added benefits, but even overruling “the man”? I was impressed.
Fifteen minutes later, I pulled into the driveway of my subject’s house. To calm my nerves I took a deep breath then grabbed my legal pad and voice recorder.
When I stepped out of my truck and nearly fell over in shock. In the bed of my truck, where I placed my laundry basket, there was nothing but a smattering and scattering of dirty, wrinkly shirts, jeans and underwear. The laundry basket was jackknifed under a flat spare tire and lug nut wrench.
“Interview,” I said under my breath.
It wasn’t my position as a reporter that got me off with a warning it was the disheveled appearance and assumption that the “interview” was for me. Everything I did screamed, “this dude needs a life, but first a job.”
The next day, thankful for being given a second chance, so to speak, I changed over my license plates. Kind of symbolic.

NC Highway Patrol - it's always something

Ben — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 12:14:14 +0000

First it was drunk troopers. Now it's a brute who abuses animals.

The mouthbreather (who, get this - was the HEAD of K9 training) got a favorable ruling from an administrative law judge (whatever that is) saying that the cretin should be reinstated to his job with back pay and lawyer fees.

The Governor and the HP commander say he should stay gone.

Morrison says that Jones acted in good faith while training Ricoh.

Morrison (the judge) is a turd who is trying to placate the Police Benevolent Association. And according to the PBA

In order for us to enforce the law and protect the citizens we must at least provide that same courtesy to officers that risk their lives every day protecting the rest of us

Well! Here all this time I thought ya'll were the only ones authorized to properly train working dogs!

Oreo Cookies Spilled on Highway Cause Major Delays

xperiencedskeptic — Mon, 19 May 2008 17:57:45 +0000

Police say a trailer loaded with 14 tons of double-stuffed Oreos overturned, spilling the cookies still in their plastic sleeves into the median and roadway. The truck's driver was traveling from Chicago to Morris on Interstate 80 around 4 a.m, according to Illinois State Police Sgt. Brian Mahoney, when he fell asleep and hit the median.

"The boxes came out of the trailer and boxes were ripped open," he said.

The crash about 50 miles southwest of Chicago remains under investigation.

No charges have been filed but both lanes of traffic remain closed while authorities remove the cookies.

The story can be seen here: http://www.ktvu.com/automotive/16326261/detail.html

http://www.inplacenews.com

Don't start speeding, State and Counties agree on a deal

wantaghnews — Thu, 01 May 2008 13:40:57 +0000

One month ago, Nassau and Suffolk County Executives announced their plans to stop patroling the Long Island Expressway, Seaford-Oyster Bay Expressway and Sunrise Highway; all are major state-owned roadways.

Today, May 1, was the deadline for a 25% county highway police patrol reduction on these state-owned rodas. Reports are that a deal, not finalized, has been made between the State and Nassau and Suffolk Counties. No reduction in county police patroling will occur until the deal is set.

Both Executive Tom Suozzi and Executive Steve Levy said that this was in response to budget cuts from Albany. For 20 years county resources have been used to patrol state-owned roads. New York State Troopers currently patrol all major state-owned roads excluding those in Long Island and New York City.

Nassau County Police Highway Patrol has 8 cars which are staffed 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. There are 62 officers and supervisors are assigned to the LIE and SOB Expressway.

Suffolk County Police Highway Patrol has 61 officers assigned to the LIE and Sunrise Highway.

Each county spends approximately $12 million annually to patrol state highways in the county.

New CHP Laws on cell phones

wespeakrealestate — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 17:35:57 +0000

Going into

Effective July 1^st 2008

DRIVER 18 AND OVER

Drivers 18 and over will be allowed to use a hands- free device to talk on their wireless telephone while driving.
The new law does not prohibit dialing, but drivers are strongly urged not to dial while driving.
It is legal to use a Blue Tooth or other earpiece so long as only one ear is uncovered.
Speaker phone is acceptable to use while driving. The law does not specifically prohibit it its use, but an officer can pull over and issue a citation to drivers of any age if, in the officer’s opinion, the driver was distracted and not operating the vehicle safely. Text paging while driving is unsafe at any speed and strongly discouraged.

DRIVERS UNDER 18

No drivers under the age of 18 may use a wireless telephone, pager, laptop, or any other electronic communication or mobile services device to speak or to text while driving in any manner, even hands free.
The exception is in emergency situation to call police, fire or medical authorities.
Statistics show that teen drivers are more likely than older drivers to be involved in crashes because they lack driving experience and tend to take greater risks. Teen drivers are vulnerable to driving distractions such as talking with passengers, eating, or drinking and talking or texting on wireless phones, which increase the change of getting involved in serious vehicle crashes.
Parents cannot grant permission to allow the use wireless telephones while driving.
For drivers under the age or 18, this considered a SECOND violation meaning that a law enforcement officer may cite you for using a hands- free wireless phone if you were pulled over for another violation. However, the prohibition against using a handheld telephone while driving is a PRIMARY violation for which a law enforcement officer can pull you over.

Fines

First offence- $20
Second Offence - $50

DRIVE SAFELY

Flash Headlights Against Fuzz

ash1973 — Sun, 13 Apr 2008 05:19:54 +0000

I have some good memories of riding in the car with my father on back country roads of Iowa and even Interstates where, after seeing a highway patrol staked under a bridge or behind a billboard, he would flash oncoming drivers in an attempt to warn them of the fuzz. What happened to that practice? As an adult now I never see that happening and it is such a simple and productive act to help fellow drivers.

If I see a police car staked out painting the highway for speeders I flash my headlights for the next couple miles trying to warn drivers who are heading for the trap. I imagine I have saved many drivers a ticket if they paid attention. It seemed commonplace back in the 70s when my Pa was teaching me driving etiquette. It is a lost art from what I have witnessed. We need to begin a new campaign to revive this simple and effective method of countering the fuzz. I am not the only one thinking this way, see this blog to see that it works: http://forums.motortrend.com/70/6524763/the-drive-in/do-you-ever-flash-your-headlights-to-warn-driver-o/index.html

Anyway peeps, lets work together, this is a method that is better than radar detectors and can do us all some good...so get to flashin against the fuzz!

'the candidate' - it's like 'american idol' only more nights a week

Holly Cara Price — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 13:24:37 +0000

it occurred to me that this white house race is more like American Idol than anything else. every night i tune in to watch hours of MSNBC and CNN and network analysis of the day's happenings in McCain, Obama, and Clinton World. i've gotten to the point where if i am not home, i TAPE Countdown because i need my Keith, the light that cuts through the darkness.

THE CHARACTERS:

Obama is like the slim, handsome superhero who can smash atoms with his bare hands (okay - he's not a great bowler, but can save the world nonetheless). he's smart, he's well spoken, he's calm, he's - what's the word - oh yes, presidential.

Hillary is looking more and more like an educated, conservatively-dressed (albeit in bright colors), helmet-headed version of Britney Spears we gaped at a few months ago when every night was a new drama illuminated by the bad camerawork of TMZ. in news rubbernecking, she has actually replaced Britney for me. she's like the Terminator - tear off a limb, she's still not down and out! she refuses to die! in a way i have come to admire this, even though i think we're wasting valuable time and money this way. and the Bosnia thing, well, that was just embarrassing beyond belief.

and then there's McCain. now here's a guy who looks like something out of Highway Patrol with Broderick Crawford. Crawford ended every show with a homily, my all-time favorite being 'the clowns in the circus they're real funny. but on the highway they're murder.' McCain is not the brightest bulb according to recent news stories, but looks like a Rhodes scholar next to GWB.

Fee Dodging CHEATERS

uneducatedone — Thu, 27 Mar 2008 21:50:48 +0000

So, does the car being driven next to you have out of state plates? California law requires that vehicles used in California by persons living or working here, be registered in this State. It is not uncommon to see many out of state plates rolling around our towns and many are tourists, family and friends. But some are simply dodging fees that are due to the State; a few out of ignorance, but most with the intention to pay less for registering their vehicle.

The California Highway Patrol launched a website a while back that allows anyone to report vehicles registered out of state that appear to be used primarily on our roads. You can report the vehicle information via their "Cheaters" website; http://www.chp.ca.gov/prog/cheaters.cgi

The CHP sends informational letters to the registered owner warning them of the violation and pending enforcement. With many more eyes on the roadways, maybe the State will recover some of the fees due from the folks that just don't want to pay!

South Carolina police, they're everything you think they are

casualcausality — Fri, 21 Mar 2008 01:50:30 +0000

The U.S. Attorney General's Office and the Department of Justice's Civil Rights Division are investigating the South Carolina Highway Patrol. In series of videos, dash-board cameras have recorded South Carolina police officers intentionally hitting black suspects with cars and using racial slurs in their pursuit.

"I nailed the fuck out of him. He went flying up into the air," said officer Steven Garren getting out of his car last June, "Yeah, I hit him I was trying to hit him." Garren was only given a three day suspension, which he is currently appealing. Extended video.

Alexander Richardson drove his patrol car through the grounds of an apartment complex in pursuit of suspect who was fleeing on foot. According to Highway patrol records, Richardson endangered the lives of two five-year old children who had been on the playground that he drove over. At one point, he hits the suspect with his car. He was given a two day suspension. Extended video.

"You better run," said officer Daniel C. Campbell, using a derogatory term for blacks, at traffic stop in South Carolina, "because I'm fixin' to kill you." He was reassigned to office duty.

In another county, a white trooper handcuffed a black woman to his car for 40 minutes and then left her on the side of the road without transportation.
Disgusting.

Psycho cop tasers guy for speeding

disinter — Tue, 11 Mar 2008 19:10:57 +0000

UHP (Utah Highway Patrol) tasers man in front of pregnant wife and baby over an alleged speeding ticket.

Somebody needs to taser the cop.

Compliance Can Be Important: Look Out For Tasers!

glenngohr — Fri, 28 Dec 2007 03:51:52 +0000

The old adage says “laws were made to be broken.” That may be true. Chances are that there are no perfect laws and that there are always or often exceptions to the rule. However, when it comes to law enforcement, beware. If you break the law or fail to follow the rules, there will definitely be consequences.I’m not talking here about just the usual crimes and criminal activity. I’m talking about obeying and cooperating with law enforcement officials (even when you are innocent of wrongdoing or do not understand what is going on). If you do not comply with law enforcement officers (it doesn’t matter if you are guilty of a crime or if there is a problem of mistaken identity, etc.), and if you resist arrest and obstruct justice (in the minds of the law), then you will be punished by handcuffing, jail time, fines, a criminal record, and now even the deadly TASER!

Here are three recent examples of what might be considered overzealous police. In neither case was a crime committed, and the police did not give the respondents any reasonable cause to arrest them or Taser them. They should have explained what was going on, given the “suspects” a chance to respond, and possibly things would have gone much smoother. But either way, it is obvious from these stories and clips that the alleged suspects (whoever they might be—even you or me) should comply with police officers in every way possible, unless we want to experience the consequences, which can even include being Tasered.

Cases like the ones that follow also make one wonder if Taser use is being abused. Also how can Tasers be considered non-lethal when so many people have died as a result of their use. It is obvious that Tasers should only be used as a last resort (and not as a first result).

CASE #1

The first case here is of mistaken identity in Madison, Wisconsin after a 9-1-1 call reported a man being in a shopping mall with a gun (and it could have been a crank call). This was on Christmas Eve (this year). The officers found a man who supposedly fit the description, and when he did not cooperate, they Tasered him. Here is a link to the news article:

Christmas shopping horror: Man, wife blasted by Taser. Officers zap couple at mall after anonymous 9-1-1 call
http://www.wnd.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=59382

Police use Taser on man at West Towne Mall
http://www.madison.com/wsj/mad/top/index.php?ntid=263847

Man Tasered at West Towne Mall
http://wkow.madison.com/News/index.php?ID=17699

CASE #2

Here is another Taser case that happened on September 17, 2007 at a speech given by John Kerry at the University of Florida. University of Florida student Andrew Meyer is Tasered and arrested after causing a disturbance at a town hall forum, which featured Senator John Kerry, at the UF Auditorium on Sept. 17, 2007. He asked Senator Kerry about voter suppression and then if he was a member of the Skull and Bones society. Then he was apprehended and Tasered. In other words, “Was it something I said?” This incident gave rise to the statement, “Don’t Tase me, bro!”

Here are links to two YouTube videos plus some news reports.

University of Florida student Tasered at Kerry forum (YouTube video 2:23 mins.)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=6bVa6jn4rpE

Student Tasered for asking Sen. Kerry about voter suppression (YouTube video 2:55 mins.)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=tCBcOQkUNjI

UF student Tasered at Kerry forum
http://www.alligator.org/articles/2007/09/18/news/campus/arrest.txt

Florida: Police Use Taser On Student at Forum (New York Times 9/19/2007)
http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9400E3DA123AF93AA2575AC0A9619C8B63

Florida: Probation for Student in Taser Case (New York Times 10/31/2007)
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/10/31/us/31brfs-PROBATIONFOR_BRF.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

CASE #3

Here is another case from Utah where once again, a law enforcement officer has blasted an unarmed, non-threatening civilian with an electro-shock weapon—with little or no provocation. Tasers were supposed to be a less-lethal substitute for guns—not a tool for frying people into compliance, when a cop chooses not to use a strong word or a strong arm. It is obvious there are cases of Taser abuse coming to light.

More Taser Abuse: Blasted for Fighting a Ticket
http://blog.wired.com/defense/2007/11/more-Taser-abus.html

Speeding Ticket Taser (YouTube video 9:58 mins.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IMaMYL_shxc

CNN Interview:
http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2007/11/23/intv.tasered.speeder.speaks.cnn

CBS Early Show Interview:
http://www.cbsnews.com/sections/i_video/main500251.shtml?id=3533816n

Fox News:
Fox News story

The moral of the story? Don't "resist" an officer in the performance of his duties—it's illegal! (And don’t ask a politician if he is a member of Skull and Bones.)

If the police tell you to do something ... do it. You can tell your story after the situation is under control. The worst thing you can do is to argue or fight with them, because if you do, chances are a Taser will come out and it will be used. In the meantime something has to be done to stop Taser abuse.

A FEW OTHER TASER REFERENCES:

More police Taser abuse
http://www.madison.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=33320

A man is suing the police after they Tasered him and shot him with a beanbag gun for videotaping a warrantless police search
http://www.madison.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=33299

Portland man sues police (video :27 seconds)
http://www.brightcove.tv/title.jsp?title=1243494890

Suspect dies after police hit him with two shots from a stun gun
http://www.projo.com/news/content/projo_20060822_woon22.322bfc2.html

Taser Death at Vancouver Airport
http://www.madison.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=34126

Officer's Taser Use Inappropriate
http://www.madison.com/archives/read.php?ref=/tct/2005/02/15/0502150065.php

A MAN in a diabetic coma was shot with a Taser gun by cops — because they feared he was a suicide bomber
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article472087.ece

Suit Filed On Use Of Taser
http://www.madison.com/archives/read.php?ref=/wsj/2007/01/12/0701120040.php

Video: Stun Gun Abuse (includes video of man being tasered in a holding cell)
http://blog.wired.com/defense/2007/04/video_stun_gun_.html

Handcuffed suspect being tasered by officer in holding cell (LiveLeak video (1:29 mins.)
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=cb4_1176415265

Police use 'Stun Gun' on suspect while booking him at police station (LiveLeak video 5:35 mins.)
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=eb6_1198220550

A Village of Sheffield, Ohio police officer has been fired, for using his taser gun on a woman in custody. (LiveLeak video :31 mins.)
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=9d03698b5f

Complaints on cops up 23%
http://www.denverpost.com/search/ci_5438272

New South Wales Investigating how Tasers are used
http://www.taserwatch.org/2007/12/26/nsw-investigating-how-tasers-are-used/

Tasered in Spokane, Washington State
http://www.taserwatch.org/2007/12/26/tasered-in-spokane-washington-state/

Power Crazed in Pittsburgh, PA
http://www.taserwatch.org/2007/12/26/power-crazed-in-pittsburgh-pa/

17 Year Old Tasered by Ottawa Police
http://www.canada.com/ottawacitizen/news/story.html?id=ec0a922a-8429-4430-b031-0a7a8d4f8247

Taser Goes Pink (C2 version of Taser is marketed to women [and moms?])
http://blog.wired.com/defense/2007/07/taser-goes-pink.html

A great gift you should not get your wife
http://www.owngeek.com/wiki/index.php?title=Perfect_gift_for_the_Wife

STAT: Stop Taser Abuse Today (Learn—Report—Act)
http://stopTasers.org/

TaserAbuse.com
http://www.Taserabuse.com/Taser/

SEE THE MAIN SITE OF GLENN GOHR'S WEBLOG:
http://glenngohr.wordpress.com

2 drunk NC troopers in one week

Ben — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 14:49:30 +0000

Woo hoo! This one was on duty and harrassing road maintenance workers. Even though he was "staggering", he wasn't charged with DWI. Maybe you have to drive your kids into a pond to reach the level of trooper dwi.

Drunk trooper resigns, more on roads for Christmas!

Ben — Thu, 20 Dec 2007 07:09:10 +0000

RALEIGH -- A highway patrol trooper arrested for driving while impaired has resigned.On Dec. 4, police say 38-year-old Steven Bradley, of Apex, ran a stop sign and drove his car into a pond on Jones Franklin Road in Raleigh. His two children were in the car with him at the time.Police say Bradley had a blood alcohol level twice the legal limit at the time of the crash.

In addition to DWI, Bradley was charged with resisting arrest and assaulting a police officer after the accident. [.]

And the headline in our local paper today ~~reports~~ intimidates the hoi polloi by saying:

Motorists getting a head start on the holiday by hitting the state's highways this weekend will likely find more troopers with the N.C. Highway Patrol out there driving with them.

And to make sure we get the point, there is a depiction of a police car with lights flashing on top using the caption "Christmas lights."

Merry Christmas,"only ones." We will certainly try to behave ourselves.

Highway Patrol Officers in Ontario Target Americans

bluboo — Thu, 13 Dec 2007 19:52:11 +0000

How One Officer Profiles Americans and Violates Their Rights

During the first week of August this past summer, Rosalita and I were sadly returning to New York from a wonderful vacation in Northern Ontario. We had become quite fond of the people in Northern Ontario because they were friendly, warm and caring.

After spending the summer traveling across the United States and Ontario, we came to the sad conclusion that New York State may well be the worst state in America. Forget the taxes, traffic, dirt, Hillary Clinton and the cost of living … New York simply leads the country in blatant stupidity and greed. My next article will explain that in more detail, so stayed tuned!

However, this article is all about a dumpy little town called Pembroke, Ontario, and its own version of Dudley Do-Right … well, actually, he was more of a combination of Inspector Clouseau and Sheriff Buford T. Justice.

It is highly suggested that all travelers, but especially Americans, should avoid the Trans-Canada Highway (17) between North Bay and Ottawa. If you must travel this horrid stretch of road, go BELOW the speed limit, block traffic and do not stop in any of the towns. You should not stop in Pembroke or spend a single cent within its town limits.

Here is the story of an early afternoon on the first Saturday in August. Some family, straight from The Grapes of Wrath, is driving a truck eastbound on Highway 17 approaching the stink-hole called Pembroke. The truck looks like something from The Little Rascals. Stuff is hanging off the sides and the back, the truck is bouncing up and down, and it is wobbling like it has different sizes of tires on each wheel. It is a menace to itself and other vehicles.

Highway 17 is like most roads in Canada: two lanes, poorly paved and far too winding to provide opportunities to pass slow-moving traffic. There are very infrequent stretches where three lanes allow a safe passing lane for one side of the highway. Apparently, the quality of roads in the rural part of Canada is of little concern to the government and the populace.

Since Highway 17 is the only direct route from North Bay to Ottawa, it is heavily traveled by trucks, cars, campers, RV’s and buggies like the broken-down piece of you-know-what that was well in front of us. The driver was quite oblivious to the jam he was creating and did not have the decency to pull onto the shoulder to let other cars around him. The concern in this situation always has to be for other drivers who are going to get ballistic and do something stupid.

Eventually, with the grace of God and incredible patience (largely a result of being so chilled from two weeks of glorious fishing), we found ourselves directly behind the dilapidated pick-up truck. As we approached an upcoming passing lane near the Laurentian Hills, three cars behind me crossed the double yellow line and started to pass, flying by us at about 150 km/hr (about 90 mph). By the time I was able to pull into the passing lane, there was only about ¼ of a mile left to complete the pass safely.

So, starting from below 50 km/hr (which was the speed of the truck), I quickly accelerated, getting close to 60 MPH (100 KM/HR), completed the pass and let the car slow down to the posted 90 KM/HR without hitting the brakes. As we started down a hill around some wide curves, we were surprised to see the three speeders in front of us (with one car in between the last car and us). They had unfortunately caught up to the biggest road hazard in the world, an RV towing a car behind it. I had also failed to see the Canadian Smokey Bacon hiding in the trees.

We slowed down to maintain a safe distance as six of us paraded behind the RV. Meanwhile, in the rear view mirror, we saw a car crossing double yellow lines to pass other cars. When it finally passed the Joad family truckster and was behind me, I could see it was a highway patrol car. Dudley Do-Right then made a dangerous maneuver to pass me, forcing me to slam on my brakes to avoid hitting him as he cut in and missed an oncoming car. He then made an even more dangerous maneuver, passing the car in front of me on a blind curve, again narrowly missing the oncoming traffic.

In the meantime, the first two cars that had flown by me a few kilometers back made their own dangerous passes around the RV and had clear sailing … and they were fading into the horizon. You would guess that Dudley would be off after them but, instead, he put on his lights and pulled over the third car in the speeding caravan. As confusing as that was, it would get worse.

The car in front of me slowed down as Dudley and his victim pulled to the side. Dudley quickly jumped out of his car, almost falling down, but then just looked back towards us. He waved at us to pull over. Rosalita was totally stunned and we both were wondering "WTF" Quinn the Eskimo was doing with us.

When the Mighty Mountie-Wannabe approached the first vehicle, also a New Yorker (we recalled his plates as he flew by us ... the first two cars had Ontario plates), he seemed to be having a very loud and heated argument with the driver. This went on for five minutes. Finally, Officer Do-Right came to our vehicle and the following conversation ensued:

Dudley: And I suppose you are also Americans who think that you can speed and do whatever you want in Canada?

Me: Excuse me?

Dudley: So what’s your excuse for speeding?

Me: Speeding? Why didn’t you go after the other two cars who were in front us? They were the guys who were speeding.

Dudley: Because you and your buddy up there are Americans and I knew that you would pull over. You Americans really don’t give a s**t about how fast you are drive, do you?

Me: Officer, we are not looking for a fight, but when were we speeding?

Dudley: I’ve got you on the radar going 148 km/hr in a 90 km/hr zone.

Me: Are you talking about when we passed that broken down truck in the passing lane?

Dudley: Yes. And because you were going more than 125 km/hr, I have to write you a ticket that requires you to appear in court.;

Me: There’s no way that we were going that fast, you must have gotten the three cars that passed me, including the guy up there. It’s impossible for this car (a fully packed Honda CRV automatic) to go from 45 km/hr to 148 km/hr in six seconds.

Dudley: I’ve got all four of you on the radar.

Me: I really don’t think it is possible. Can I see the radar?

Dudley: No. I already erased it. Just give me your license and registration. (Rosalita begins searching the glove compartment).

Me: Then may I please go and talk to the other driver? (note: my plan was to get his information so we could fight the ticket).

Dudley: Absolutely not.

Me: You can search me or whatever …

Dudley: No. It would be unsafe for you to be out on the shoulder.

Me: Well, would you then be kind enough to give him a note?

Dudley: No. You are not going to get out of this. Give me the license and registration.

Needless to say, Dudley had parked the smokey-mobile right up on the guy’s bumper, so we could not see the license plate). When Dudley emerged from his vehicle, he gave the other guy his ticket first. As the driver pulled away, Dudley somehow managed to block our view of the other driver’s license plates. He also took another ten minutes with us to make sure we could not catch up to the guy.

Dudley then tried to show what a nice guy he was. He said that he was writing the ticket for going 125 km/hr in a 90 km/hr zone. This way, I would be charged the maximum penalty but would not have to make a court appearance. We refused to say anything else to this poor excuse of a law enforcement professional.

After we drove through that disgusting little landfill called Pembroke, we decided that we could not be bothered going back there to fight the ticket. In retrospect, this was a bad decision. We actually called attorneys when we got home, but they said the chances of getting justice in an Ontario traffic court as an American were non-existent. As one lawyer said, "I would do it but you are wasting your money. There is really nothing I can do to help. The justices are even more blind and anti-American than the highway patrol. It's cheaper to pay the fine."

As you may have suspected, I sent a detailed letter to the court with my guilty plea explaining that we could not possibly have been traveling at the speeds cited. We also explained how Dudley profiled us and violated our rights. The letter was written in both French and English, apparently to no avail. It seems that Justice N. Mitchell was not impressed (or possibly cannot read), and simply processed the charge to my credit card with all the emotion of a cash register. Maybe Mitchell and Dudley are drinking buds?

You may think the story ends here, but the next part of the saga is more bizarre. Dudley (also known as officer XXX91 … the first three digits are concealed to protect his privacy) is probably still out there preying upon unwary American travelers. Even though I've reported this area to many speed-trap web sites, there will still be dead meat for Dudley's invisible radar. Stay away from Pembroke … take another route. Drive through hell if you have to.

In the meantime, maybe the folks at Honda will take this letter as testimony, documented by the Ontario Kangaroo Court System, as proof of the sheer power and acceleration of a CRV. Dudley Do-Right’s radar gun apparently proved (despite his erasure), that a fully loaded CRV went from below 30 MPH to 90 MPH in about 7 seconds. Maybe Dudley will sign the testimonial?

Flintstones Great Gazoo Surfaces

LOTGK — Wed, 05 Dec 2007 15:41:42 +0000

The "Great Gazoo" from the 1960's cartoon, The Flintstones, has surfaced in Sevierville, Tennessee. Gazoo was the tiny flying green alien with the big space helmet that was banished from his home planet for blundering every task he handled. He was banished to Earth to assist Fred and Barney in their daily lives. Alas, more misfortune followed Gazoo on Earth as he somehow bungled every attempt to look after Fred and Barney.

The Grassy Knoll Institute asks, what has the "Great Gazoo" been doing now that the Flintstones have long since gone off the air? Apparently, Gazoo traveled back to the future and is now a Tennessee Highway Patrol officer rendering his form of justice on speeding motorists. The Grassy Knoll Institute was able to obtain this photo which is a rare shot of Gazoo in his highwayman uniform.

LURKING, THOUGHT SCREEN HELMET, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

Banning Roadside Memorials - Can Arlington National Cemetery Be Far Behind?

invar — Mon, 19 Nov 2007 17:35:10 +0000

The Secularists never stop, and it's a battle they will wage until all public view of God is removed from society.

The question remains, will Christians just let them without a fight?

Well, not in Utah, thank the Lord.

Families of Fallen Utah Highway Patrol Troopers Fight Atheist Group Over Roadside Cross Memorials

If a national atheist organization has its way, a series of 12-foot-tall memorial crosses that adorn Utah's highways will be taken down.

But not if the families of the people those crosses honor — state Highway Patrol troopers killed in the line of duty — have anything to say about it.

American Atheists Inc. has filed a federal lawsuit, arguing that the 13 white, steel crosses represent the death of Jesus Christ and therefore violate the First Amendment to the Constitution, which prohibits government establishment of religion.

But the families of the fallen heroes say otherwise. They say the crosses, which bear the names and badge numbers of the troopers, were built strictly as memorials.

..."I think it's ridiculous that a small group of offended atheists would seek to stop the family of slain troopers from honoring their loved ones as they see fit," said Byron Babione, senior legal counsel for the Alliance Defense Fund, which represents the Utah Highway Patrol Association.

The New Jersey-based American Atheists filed suit in 2005, arguing that the crosses symbolize Christianity and break state and federal laws against roadside memorials.

Isn't it amazing how an Atheist Org out of New Jersey thinks it needs to meddle in the affairs of those citizens in Utah??

I'm sure that scouring the land there in Utah - they were able to find ONE SHMOE who was willing to complain so the full weight of Northeastern Scularists can be brought to bear on memorials in Utah.

"They know very well that the cross is a Christian symbol," said Dave Silverman, spokesman for the group. "They are breaking the law by putting up memorials for fallen heroes."

The Utah Highway Patrol Association, a private organization, designed and constructed the memorials with private funding in 1998. Private citizens can memorialize troopers who died in the line of duty, under Utah state law, Babione said.

"There's nothing unconstitutional here because the memorials cost taxpayers nothing," he said.

But Brian Barnard, a lawyer representing American Atheists, said the memorial is a Roman cross, which symbolizes Christianity.

"The use of those crosses constitutes and endorses Christianity," Barnard said. "Although it's an acknowledgement of the death of these troopers, it is also an endorsement of Christianity."

Barnard said the highway association downplays the significance of the cross, claiming it is a secular symbol.

I think it does not help to give the Secularists ammo and make statements like that which will turn the argument into whether a cross is a Christian symbol or not. Everyone is aware that the cross symbolizes both faith and death as a marker. I think it would serve their interests better to simply say that it is indeed a cross - that is universally recognized as a memorial symbol that has both religious and cultural significance. Argue the point over whether having a memorial to fallen officers is an establishment of a state-run church rather than arguing over whether the cross is religious or not.

"There's no question at all that these highway patrol troopers should be honored," Barnard said. "We should all pause and thank them. But that can be done in a way that does not emphasize religion."

The group is seeking the removal of the crosses and one dollar in monetary damages.

U.S. District Judge David Sam recently heard arguments in the case and will rule soon on the legality of the crosses.

If the secularists succeed in getting the Courts to ban these memorials, it will be a giant step in the high prize of getting rid of all the white cross memorials in our National Cemeteries.