I initially thought I wasn't going to march. Friends said that I really wanted to see the parade my first year (and believe me there is lots to see in a city like New York: go-go dancers, drag queens and divas galore.) But after worship I changed my mind and decided that I needed to be with my faith community as well as with the gay community. Why?

I was talking to a friend this afternoon and confessed that I sometimes struggle with this label: gay Christian. I am not embarrassed to say I am a Christian or gay man but I find that these two words have a sort of built-in tension, within and outside the church. There is a perception that you can only be one or the other. Gay culture has generally distanced itself from Christianity and from organized religion. Many gay folk have run away for good reason - because spiritual communities are (or are perceived to be) places where we will be condemned, not accepted or not taken seriously. But my coming out experience happened in the choir loft rather than a bar or the gay social scene. It was in the context of the Church that I was given the love, affirmation and strength to claim that God accepts me unconditionally as a gay man. The nurture and support of straight and gay people of faith has been a vital part of my journey toward wholeness, healing and integration.

Still, public displays like Pride parades have made me uncomfortable in the past. I'm not sure whether that feeling was motivated by my own fears and insecurities or a concern that I would somehow make my sexuality too much of a priority in my life. But I believe that God was in the last-minute decision to march this year. God was helping me to break down the false barriers that I have created around both my spiritual life and my sexual orientation. God was inviting me to see that life is not about the safe comforts of a label (gay, Christian or otherwise) but about faith. And faith is living between the labels; it is a dynamic, personal relationship with God within the context of community; it cultivated through disciplines of study, listening and discernment; it is embodied through expressions of self-giving love, trust and freedom.

As we gathered with our brother and sister Episcopalians, Presbyterians and Methodists who were "flaming for Christ", the Riverside Church float singing their hearts out, GLBT-affirming Buddhists who got us pumped up with great tunes, the Quakers with a gorgeous, rose-covered rainbow car, and many, many more...there was such joy and energy in the air. But I also felt that the vital pulse of communities attempting to live and worship faithfully! Groups paused for prayer, to celebrate Eucharist together, to talk and and to compliment each others' floats and materials. There was no sense of hostility, fear or denominational competition but a spirit of openness, solidarity and love for each other and for the people we were going to see on the sides of the street.

By the end of the parade (almost the end, actually, as I had to cut out a little early) I had handed out almost 1,000 stickers (Beloved, Believe, Belong, Be Gay) and smiles. But more significantly, I think I gained a new sense of confidence, maybe you can even say pride - not necessarily in my church or even in the gay community. It was a time to step out in faith and publicly claim the truth that God loves me as I am and is calling many, many others (regardless of the label) to lives of faith and love!

     It didn't start that well cos I was still very hung over Monday from a big night out on Saturday...yes it was that big!  It was Jager bombs big.  I get into work and as I'm not on the net at home at the moment, I'm still sorting through plans and options and wireless or cable, I've been doing a fair bit of surfing and blogging at work as I have full access.  My boss tells me that I have received a warning about my net usage....too much, way too much!!  They, the company that we are contracted to and who provide our computers and net access, have told him that my net usage must drop or they will inform our Head Office!  So now I'm having to go to net cafes cos I've too busy to work something out for home.  So I think that is a crappy start to the week. 

      Tuesday, early night in I think, just as I'm leaving work my ex calls to see if I want to catch up for one drink.  I figure one won't hurt so go meet her at this nice venue that has couches and $3 wines for their 2 hour happy hour!  Then my housemate, who technically lives upstairs in his own flat, joins us.  It was 9 before we got home.

     Wednesday, early night in I think, but silly me drops into my local for one on the way home.  I also had ulterior motives there as I was trying to find out exactly what I had gotten up Saturday night after I had had pizza with my mates and been put into a cab to go home, I hadn't gone home!  Just about to leave and a friend arrives who is pretty close to a mate who drinks there and he is dying of cancer, like he probably won't make it through next week.  So she has never been through anything like this before and I stay around to let her pour out the crap she needs to and to reassure her that how she is feeling is perfectly normal.  You go crazy trying to watch someone die.

     Thursday, early night in I think.  I actually make it home and am cooking dinner when a friend calls to see if I will meet him down at the local for a couple.  Given I had gotten home early from work and had eaten I thought well I could have two hours on the couch or two hours of possibly stimulating conversation, the conversation proved more attractive.  My housemate also called in on his way home so it was ten before we got back home and as he stayed for another drink at my place, eleven before bed.

     Friday night I thought right, its Friday I'm going for a drink so I organise housemate to meet me at a bar in the city with a happy hour.  We stayed for two drinks and decided it just wasn't happening for either of us so back to our local.  We ended up there only for a couple and we were actually home early sharing a joint.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell

by hilzoy

Yesterday the House Armed Services Committee held hearings on Don't Ask, Don't Tell. Apparently, there were fireworks, and perhaps in a different mood I might enjoy poking fun at them. But I was struck by two things about the hearing. The first was Rep. Patrick Murphy's questioning of a witness opposed to letting gay men and lesbians serve in the military, whether openly or not:

Murphy makes what I've always thought is an important point about arguments against letting gay men and lesbians serve: that those arguments are an insult to the men and women in our armed forces. He says:

"Ms. Donnelly, you testified that gays and lesbians cannot serve openly in the military because, and I quote, it would be detrimental to unit cohesion, end quote. In essence, you're arguing that straight men and women in our military aren't professional enough to serve openly with gay troops while successfully completing their military mission. As a former Army officer, I can tell you I think that's an insult to me and to many of the soldiers."

I imagine that it often happens that soldiers who are part of the same unit do not like one another. Sometimes, a soldier might even despise another member of his or her unit, or think that other soldier immoral or contemptible. And yet, when these feelings do not have to do with sexual orientation, we routinely expect soldiers to put their personal feelings aside and do their jobs. And when they don't, we assume that they, not the people they endanger, should be disciplined.

If, for instance, a soldier is racist, and cannot find a way to work with African-American soldiers, we do not discipline or expel the African-Americans. If a soldier dislikes another and cannot put her feelings aside and do her job, we do not punish the soldier she dislikes; we punish her. In all other cases, we assume that given a choice between two soldiers, one of whom is trying to complete his mission to the best of his ability, and one of whom is unable or unwilling to put his animosity aside and do his job, we choose the first. We expect this of our men and women in uniform, and we also expect that they will be given the training and the leadership they need to act like professionals.

I have never understood why it's different when gay men and lesbians enter the picture.

The second is a passage from the testimony (pdf) of Captain (ret.) Joan Darrah. Captain Darrah served in naval intelligence for almost thirty years. She writes:

"In September of 2001, the true impact of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” on me personally came into sharp focus. On Tuesday, September 11, I was at the Pentagon attending the weekly 8:30 intelligence briefing. During the briefing, we watched on CNN as the planes hit the Twin Towers. Finally at 9:30 my meeting was adjourned. When American Flight 77 slammed into the Pentagon, I was at the Pentagon bus stop. As it turned out, the space I had been in seven minutes earlier was completely destroyed. Seven of my co-workers were killed. The reality is that if I had been killed, my partner then of 11 years, would have been the last to know as I had not dared to list her in my emergency contact information."

I cannot imagine what it must be like to serve in the military, of all things, and not dare to list the woman you love on your emergency contact information. Not to know that if something happens to you, she will be told. To depend on others to decide whether or not to inform the woman you have been with for eleven years, others who might or might not accept who you are, and who she is to you.

Asking someone to choose between serving their country and acknowledging who they are is obviously cruel. But the smaller and more intimate effects of our policy, like this one, are what truly brings its inhumanity home to me.

By Tony Grew • July 25, 2008

Credit Photo Lewishamdreamer

A gay couple who fled to Turkey from Iran may be separated after the United Nations accepted one man's case and denied the other.

The Office of the UN High Commissioner for Refugees (UNHCR) is meant to protect and support refugees and assist in their return or resettlement.

Kamal and Reza hoped could start a life together without the fear of being punished for their sexuality.

Kamal has been told he will be recognised as a refugee but Reza received word earlier this week that he will not.

"Reza will have a chance to appeal this decision with the aid of a different UNHCR legal officer," said a spokesman for IRQO, the Canada-based Iranian Queer Organisation.

"We should urge UNHCR on appeal to recognize Reza as a refugee. The other option is for us to request UNHCR to present Kamal to the Canadian Embassy in Ankara for resettlement purposes.

"Then Kamal can apply for Reza as his common law partner."

Human rights groups claim up to 4,000 gay men and lesbians have been executed since the 1979 revolution in Iran.

These are usually under the guise of honour killings, says a 2006 report released by LGBT activists OutRage!

Full Article Here

GLBT Citizen Journalist Receives Press Credentials to The Big Tent

This year’s presidential race is opening up more and more opportunities for bloggers. The national progressive blog Daily Kos along with the Colorado’s largest progressive group Progress Now, GOOGLE & others are sponsoring a 9,000 sq. foot two story facility for journalist, bloggers and new media content producers to work out of. There will be a Digg Stage with prominent national leaders, as well as a Google Retreat with a YouTube kiosk where bloggers can make their own YouTube videos. The Big Tent will be open throughout the Democratic National Convention, Aug. 25- 28. The facility will be located steps away from the Pepsi Center which will play host to the 2008 Democratic Convention. In addition to live feeds from the convention floor, high speed internet access, food & beverages and entertainment, the big tent will also host daily discussion panels featuring some of the top progressive leaders in the country.

Middle Tennessee new media producer Valerie Reynolds host of AVALON FARMCAST & AVALONFARMBLOG will be covering GLBT news from the convention including interviews with Tennessee’s first transgender Delegate Marisa Richmond, members of Denver’s Gay & Lesbian Center and HRC’s Premier Convention event: Rock the Vote, a concert featuring Melissa Ethridge, Cyndi Lauper and others yet to be announced.

A former Florida radio & TV professional Ms. Reynold’s is also a graduate of M.T.S.U’s mass communications program. She produced and hosted Nashville’s Gay TV on community access TV for 5 years and in Nashville is perhaps best known as a singer/songwriter. She performed regionally with her 5 piece blues band : The Bad Cactus Blues Band in the 90’s and received a Grammy nomination for her CD GOOD WOMAN BLUES in 1995. Reynolds currently is in post production on a documentary about Nashville’s 1960’s R&B music scene that included a guitarist yet to be known as Jimi Hendrix. During the upcoming convention, Her blog entries may be accessed at http://avalonfamblog.wordpress.com with additional guest blog entries at Tennessee Equality Project’s (TEP) new blog http://grand-divisions.blogspot.com. Her podcasts will be at www.avalonfarmcast.com and on itunes (AVALON FARMCAST) and her videos from Denver can be downloaded at www.youtube.com/avalonfarms.

###

In light of such a reality, I am so grateful for the “new” spirituality that is emerging more and more.  It lives outside the confines of any one religion or any one concept of “God.”  The unprecedented globalization that we experience today is bringing to consciousness the tribal nature of a “my God against your God” mentality.  Go to any bookstore and look at the spirituality section and you will see there a large selection of spiritual books, not based in any one religion.  Look at 12 Step programs which are hotbeds of personal growth where people of all religions (or no religion) come together.  One concept of God is not thrust on anyone.  Everyone chooses their own concept of a “Higher Power.”  And it works!  People don’t get caught up in a “my God against your God” mentality, or fights over whose belief system is correct.  They get caught up in growing as human beings and doing good for themselves and others!  Period!  And isn’t that what being “Godly” is all about?

I believe the Christ knew this and tried to break through this tribal mentality of God.    And he got in trouble for it!  For in his day, just as in our own day, there were upstanding religious people who felt very threatened at the thought that their particular “God” or belief system wasn’t the best and the one to which all should aspire.

Instead of fighting over belief systems or worrying about whether or not mine is the best, can we look at what is common among them and what makes us grow in love and self giving toward others?

The answer is yes. Most gays and lesbians have some extent of difficulty coming out. The more important the relationship is to them, the harder the coming out process tends to be. The reason for that, of course, is that there is more to lose if the person rejects them.

So, gays and lesbians will often "test the waters" first in order to determine how likely acceptance will be for them or to learn what hurdles they might face in gaining acceptance from you. Common ways for a gay person to determine this are simply to bring up gay issues or the subject of homosexuality. This may be as innocuous a question as, "Hey, do you ever watch Ellen on TV?" Or it could be in relation to politics, "What do you think about McCain's stand on gay marriage?" In opening a dialog with you, your gay friend can gauge your responses and see how "gay friendly" you are.

Other signs may be the dropping of hints. The gay person will give tiny insights and watch your response to them. They may talk of their "significant other" without mentioning that person's gender. They may talk frequently about activities they are doing with their partner, but never mention the nature of the relationship. They may talk about clubs they go to. Sometimes the gay person will say things like, "You really don't know me."

Gays that are coming out for the first time may also be depressed, nervous and on edge. If someone has not come out before, they have no way of knowing what responses their friends and family are likely to have. In addition, they have no positive experiences of coming out to draw on. They may spent inordinate amounts of time on the internet looking up the subject. They may have books related to gay issues and coming out issues.

Depending on your response to these hints, your gay friend may or may not choose to complete the coming out process. Sometimes, the hints are so many and so obvious that coming out is hardly necessary by the time we get around to it! I dropped so many hints to the first friend I came out to, she just blatantly asked me one day if I was a lesbian!

I once had a cousin try to come out to me. He tested the waters by "mistakenly" taking me to a gay club in Manhattan. I was 20 and unaware of my own sexual orientation. I'm afraid I took the socially acceptable path at the time and asked to leave the club. He never did come out to me, although shortly after I came to the realization he was gay. I had blown my chance to be open to him. It is one of the great regrets in my life, since he died of AIDS shortly after. I was never able to tell him that being gay was OK and I loved him just the same. Which I did.

So, if you know someone you think may be gay or lesbian and you feel they are dropping hints or "testing," the best thing you can do is to reassure them. tell your friend you are open minded and that you really don't care if someone is gay or not. Tell them what matters most to you is how that person treats you and how you get along. Hopefully, in time, your friend will gather the courage to be honest and open with you by coming out. It will strengthen your relationship and you (and s/he) will be glad they did it!

After Billy's parents are killed he moves home to care for his little brother Johnny, who is mentally challenged. Together the two struggle through the loss of their parents. Meanwhile, Billy's best friend from childhood, Dean, has moved back to town having been injured from the war in Iraq. Over time, Billy's childhood feelings toward Dean resurface, feelings that he fears may end their friendship if discovered. Both men discover hidden secrets that will change their lives forever. These three people must come together to rebuild friendships and family in a time where everything in their world seems unsure.

Cast:

Ronnie Kerr as Billy
Jack Sway as Johnny
Jason Van Eman as Dean

---

This movie was so sweet, it's about two bestfriends who was gotten apart because one of them was enlisted to the army... the story revolved several years later, when Billy moved back to his hometown, and Dean finished his duty in army. It was a really slow pace movie, and the storyline was simple, only three actors involved in this movie, but just as I said, it was a really sweet movie.

a pitcher of Ronnie Kerr

a pic of Jason van Eman

I think they both are pretty hott :)

Anyway, this is the first part of the movie:

But reasonable people would not include the Alabama legislature, which in is great wisdom passed a law banning dildos, vibrators, and other weapons of mass stimulation.

Not content with the law as it stands, Alabama Attorney General Troy King wants the legislature to make the law even more draconian.

I remember Troy from college. He was always a little weird. He used to write frequent letters to the CW, which described in detail his disgust with homosexuals hooking up in public toilets (well before Larry Craig), a subject he seemed to be intimately familiar with, and exhorted readers to go eat at Cracker Barrel, which at the time was under fire for a policy of discriminating against having gay employees. Troy always seemed just a little too obsessed with homosexual perversion.

Alert readers may remember that Loretta Nall sent Troy King a blow up pig:

My suspicion now seems likely to have been confirmed.

Loretta explains

This is not about being gay. This is about being a hypocrite...of the highest order

There is an official denial of the rumor about Troy King now....so I can say what the rumor is.

According to rumors flying around for the last week Troy King, our
rabidly homophobic, anti-sex toy, Sunday School teaching, pro-execution Republican Attorney General is GAY! And I don't mean that as in happy either. I'd bet he is anything but happy right now. In fact, according to two sources he is about to resign. [..]

I have been sitting on this story for about a week. Truth is I am SORE from having to sit on it so long....but not as sore as Troy King is.

Loretta elaborates:

I have some friends in pretty high places in Alabama politics so I called one of them up with the juicy details. They told me they heard a rumor about his sexual orientation some six months ago from a former reporter with a large, credible newspaper in Alabama. I also know that reporter and knew them to be very credible. The rumor at the time was that Troy's mystery man was his old college roommate who he gave a position to when he took over the AG office in 2004. Supposedly when Troy was out of town so was lover boy.

The story then became that the mystery man was a young man who had just graduated from Troy University and was the Homecoming King(no pun intended) (God that gets confusing...Troy King with the homecoming king who graduated from Troy) and that was who the wife walked in on. Then a few weeks later Troy and his boy toy from Troy were spotted at the YMCA (not kidding) engaging in....ummmm....inappropriate activities. Yeah...at the YMCA...made famous by the Village People. Apparently Troy has no inkling of what it means to be 'discreet'.

I'm betting they are both true. If Troy King can be a closet gay and Alabama Attorney General at the same time then there exists in this universe the infinite possibility for him to be a promiscuous, closet gay, Alabama Attorney General. But apparently closet and promiscuous don't go so well together. But, hell, no one is claiming that he's smart are they?

As far as the significance of this story, Loretta explains:

There are so many things that make this a delicious story. Gay Sex, high ranking elected officials who are rabidly anti-gay in public but turn out to be gay in private, they get caught at the YMCA (of all places), the whole sex toy incident, the 'below the belt' legislation that Troy has made a focal point during his time in office, his desire to be the guy who injects death row inmates with deadly chemicals. I bet this is why he objects to DNA testing, ya know? Wonder where all they would find his DNA? It's really not much different than what Bill Clinton did with Monica Lewenski...except Troy is a Republican and his mystery partner is GAY!! Lordy, does it get any better than this?

Head On Radio Network is one of several sites making video and musical parodies which take advantage of Troy King's embarrassment.

Another one is found at the myspace page for Mock 5

Alabama Queen

Troy King has refused to comment on the allegations, claiming that his kids would be subject to teasing.

HRC Announces "Rock to Win" - Denver CO - performance by Melissa Etheridge
2008-05-29
Human Rights Campaign Announces "Rock to Win" Event Event to include special performance by Melissa Etheridge, will be held in Denver during Democratic National Convention

WASHINGTON - The Human Rights Campaign, the nation's largest gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender civil rights organization, announced today that it will sponsor an event called "Rock to Win" in Denver, Colorado, during the Democratic National Convention. There will be a special performance by Oscar and Grammy award-winning, singer-songwriter, Melissa Etheridge.

"All of America, and the world at large, has so much at stake in this year's election. Four years ago, GLBT issues were used by the right wing in an attempt to distract and manipulate voters, and we vowed to fight those forces and continue to educate the electorate on the road to equality," said Human Rights Campaign President Joe Solmonese. "We have largely succeeded in reshaping the political landscape. 'Rock to Win' is a celebration of our growth and progress, and a grand kickoff to hard work ahead in the general to elect a new president of our nation."

"Rock to Win" will also honor the creators and cast of Milk, the much anticipated film about San Francisco City Supervisor Harvey Milk. Milk was murdered thirty years ago for his role as a fearless champion of GLBT equality. Other artists and special guests who will be in attendance at "Rock to Win" will be announced in the days to come.

"Rock to Win" will be held at the Fillmore Auditorium in Denver-a venue modeled on the historic San Francisco Fillmore rock club-on Tuesday, August 26, the second night of the Democratic National Convention, at 7:30 p.m. Tickets go on sale to the public June 7, 2008.

The Human Rights Campaign is America's largest civil rights organization working to achieve gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender equality. By inspiring and engaging all Americans, HRC strives to end discrimination against GLBT citizens and realize a nation that achieves fundamental fairness and equality for all.

Sometimes, I really start asking myself what the purpose of the dating scene might be. 95% of the people hitting on me are typical serial killers: Male, white, between 20 and 40. Well, nothing new one could say, assuming that there are more than 90% straight people out there. Now comes the funny part: Most of them ask me out (or to bed) on a GLBT profile page, where I’m declared L/T, not even the slightest B. All right then, they would just like to know how it would be how it is to get a hermaphrodite laid – weird. Still, why not pick a straight one? Well, in the end not my problem, I just hit the guys hitting on me and – quelle surprise – they’re mostly not into that.
But there’s a thing that really scares the hell out of me. Closely all of them – as well as some girls – always start with “I love that sadness in your eyes.” When this started, it startled me a little, and I began asking myself: Am I looking that much as if I were a melancholic? Funny somehow, for I’ve tried really hard for a long time to look happy all day before I realised that looking sad sometimes takes less effort and has a nice touch. *smile* Yes, I have to admit somehow I’m in love with this frail and sweet side of mine although it’s not all I’ve got. It just has one downside: Most of the people falling for that are guys, not girls – bad luck. Well, looks as if I had to turn myself into a butch or turn the butches around me into typical men (but to me, they would lose style). But lazy as I am, I’ll be doing nothing, sitting around, reading books and watching telly. Yes, I won’t change, their turn. And if yet another guy wants to get me laid, just smile and wave. Or, of course, sing “Hit the Road Jack”. I'm still picturing some guy beating in rage on the pavement.

Try not to behave all the time,

Liz

I saw another guy in Provincetown last summer. I don't know how old he was, but I'd take a guess he was in his 70's. He was wearing a dress, make-up and a wig and was parading the streets with a sign that said, "I'm finally out of the closet." Even for Provincetown this guy was an eye catcher! The smile on his face lit up the street.

I think it's great that these guys finally became themselves, even if it took awhile. I think there is also a lesson to be learned from their stories. They never outgrew being gay. It stayed with them all their lives and I am sure it caused them a lot of suffering over the years to live a straight lifestyle. It most likely caused their spouses suffering, too. If you think you can outlive your homosexuality, think again!

If you are gay or lesbian and are coming out in midlife, visit my website at www.discoveringpride.com

• A session in english called "Transwriting" where I speak about my writing, how I was met by the media and society at large. Included reading some of my poems in both Norwegian and English. See description here.
• A writer's workshop in two parts, where the first will be held at PrideHouse on Monday and the second at RFSL on Thursday. This will be in Norwegian/Swedish, unless someone  english-speaking  wants to attend.

I'm so delighted to have this opportunity, thanks to Punkfairy! It is a bit scary, but mostly exiting. I get to spend the week at his place. There are so many interesting workshops and other events going on that I like to attend!

The article got me thinking again about why I didn't realize my transsexuality at a younger age. I try not to regret it, not to be bitter, but it's hard. Time after time I was told at the Norwegian Gender Clinic, that if I just had realized throughout my childhood and at least puberty; then I would have fit the transsexual box. Then I would have gotten the treatment that I need. So why was I so stupid that I didn't understand what was wrong with me?

1. Cildhood. Nobody ever tried to push me into a girl-role. I was just me and didn't get much trouble for it.

2. Puberty. Too much happened at the same time in my life. My family moved when I was 12 and I didn't make any friends. I'm still not sure as to why, but probably my failure to be a proper girl did have something to do with it, along with a lot of other reasons.

3. Books. So for the next 6 years I lived my life in the books. I forgot I had a body. That didn't matter when reading anyway. A Norwegian author named Elin Brodin had a lot of "female" protagonists falling in love with gay men. I identified strongly with those "women" and bought their rejection of altering their bodies in any way. If they could live like that, I could too. As soon as I grew up and could move away to a city.

4. Sexual orientation. I always knew I liked guys. And for a long time my sexual identity overruled my gender identity. At the same time I was unable to see myself as a straight girl. I felt like a gay man, but everyone and everything told me that was untrue. All the transmen I saw in the media was really macho and presumably heterosexual. If I had to like girls to be a transsexual man, then I had to be a girl, although I didn't feel like one. Thanks to Lukas for revealing that transmen can be gay too!

To deal with this I have two options:
1. To blame myself and my past. I should be angry at my parents for accepting me as a child, be angry at myself for taking refuge in the books and hating myself for being gay.
2. To blame the image for transsexuals that I was presented and still have to fulfill to get diagnosis and treatment.

I've always preferred outward anger to inward anger; hate the world rather than myself. Until I can get to a point of peace, I will continue so. Inward anger is the path to destroying myself. I refuse to blame myself for not having enough problems in my childhood and puberty. Outward anger is hopefully the path to destroying the GID-clinic and the narrow concept of transsexualism.

See also:

Reasons I once had not to transition

T-boy Jacky: I was never  tomboy

Matt Kailey

I met up with international super star and Solid Gold Dancer, Stacie, yesterday.  This is *always* a blissful experience.  I just love love love Stacie.  And her pants.  But that's another story.  While hanging in her studio, she presented me with a cd of all the images she captured of my boys in May.  I cannot believe how wonderful they all are. I cannot believe those are my children.  I cannot stop smiling at the life and joy and laughter and love Stacie managed to capture.  These kids are ALIVE!  We've had sessions done before, but nothing -absolutely NOTHING like this.  These images are breathtaking.  And one of them has been entered into a photography contest. Fingers crossed!  Out of the 169 or so images, it's nearly impossible to pick any favorites, but here are just a few that touch my heart --- I feel I'll more than likely be posting more because i just cannot stop looking at them.  WOW WOW WOW

Finally, WTF???  I could actually write about a thousand things here, but what is really on my mind is a conversation I had last night with Stacie.  WTF is up with legal rights not being extended to GLBT folks?  I don't know about you, but sharing a home, a bed, finances, health care, children (with legal adoption or legal guardianship or just by freaking love,) joys, pains, struggles, achievements, and legal documents pretty much means married to me!  When folks who love each other and live together as a family and have done so with a commitment to one another ... well, isn't that what marriage is?  Why must those people be referred to as "roommates?"  I tell you what - I've had a lot of roommates in my life and NONE of them worked out like the above.  I'm so sick and tired of my friends being dismissed, discredited, and disadvantaged because they either a) don't have and don't want a penis, or b) happen to have a penis and would like another, too.  Let's just petition to change some forms, eh?  I'd like to petition the US to include spaces for two middle names on all forms and to add domestic partnership to the list of marital status. Really, a tiny bit of ink.  Is that so hard?  WTF, people?

If anyone has been to Al-Anon you will know that, contrary to what people may think, it is not so much about how to change the alcoholic, as it is how to change one’s self and how one reacts to the alcoholic.  It’s learning how to deal with things as they are and practicing different ways of reacting and responding so that one can have some semblance of peace in the midst of the chaos.  It’s about removing one’s self from the “game,” the drama of the addiction.  It’s about detachment and the ability to begin living peacefully and with some semblance of joy.

This morning after my meditation I read a bit more of Eckhart Tolle’s book The Power of Now:  A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment.  In the second chapter entitled “Consciousness:  The Way Out of Pain,” Tolle says that most of the pain that we experience in life is self created.  “The pain that you create now is always some form of non acceptance, some form of unconscious resistance to what is. (p.33)   Detachment comes when I am able to tap that centered place within myself, accept what is now and choose not to let it ruin my day.  Yes, I may be upset by various circumstances, but I can choose not to let it ruin my day.  It is what it is.  And I am what I am.  Can I live in the  peace of  eternity right now, despite what is happening around me?  Can I be like a duck and allow things to slide off me, without affecting the core of peace at the center of my being?

Dorian realises he is gay in his final year of high school. He meets another gay youth locally, but remains confused. He starts therapy, then resorts to confession in the Church, and finally comes out to his brother. The latter teaches him how to fight and tries to have him spend a night with a prostitute, to make him become straight, to no avail. Dorian then decides to come out to his father; he gets kicked out of the house. He moves to New York City and finds a boyfriend, but he gets dumped after two months. His brother visits him and they learn their father has died of a heart attack. At the funeral, his mother tells him she regrets not stop his father from being angry with him.

Cast:

Michael McMillian as Dorian Lagatos
Lea Coco as Nicky Lagatos
Steve Fletcher as Tom Lagatos
Mo Quigley as Maria Lagatos
Cody Nickell as Ben

---

It was a comedy movie about coming out, although the story was a bit bitter, but the director managed to convert it into a laugh-induced movie :)

A pitcher of Michael McMillian

and Lea Coco

quote:

Maria Lagatos: [in reference to Dorian's father and her husband, who has recently passed] He could be a real son of a bitch, couldn't he?
Dorian Lagatos: [turning around with a look of shock and surprise] Excuse me?
Maria Lagatos: What you didn't think I knew that?
Dorian Lagatos: I didn't think you'd say it!

Trailer:

Taiguara Pires
Terça-feira, 22 de julho de 2008 às 17:29h

The enjoyment of straight sex is one reason some women have difficulty in coming to the realization they are lesbian. It is very confusing if you are a female enjoying straight sex, but are having strong emotional attachments to women. It is important to realize that sex is partly emotional, but also partly mechanical in nature. If the right erogenous zones are stimulated and the hormones are flowing, you are likely to have an orgasm.

The big fallacy that causes confusion in this case is the strong association of homosexuals with the sex act. What really defines us as lesbians is not the sex act, but rather our romantic emotional attachments to other women. As a result of those romantic feelings we have sex. In the case of lesbianism the chicken (emotion) definitely comes before the egg (sex).

Hope this helped! If you have a question feel free to contact me at Pat@discoveringpride.com.

E o que será que os políticos tem em comum com a maioria dos integrantes do mundo GLS? Tudo. Será que os dois politicos e pessoas do meio GLs tiveram aulas com os sofistas? hauahuaua.

Acho que sim.

Eu tenho falado nos posts anteriores sobre a doce enganação que os leks do meio fazem, promessas e mais promessas, mentiras contadas mil vezes e que passam a ser verdade. Os políticos também fazem isso. Então vemos as semelhanças entre as partes.

Para quem não sabe os Sofistas eram um grupo de filosofos gregos. Mas não vamos entrar na história, mas pegar um detalhe da arte que eles ensinavam.

"Historicamente o termo sofista, no seu primeiro e mais comum significado, é equivalente ao paralogismo matemático, que é uma demonstração aparentemente rigorosa que, todavia, conduz a um resultado nitidamente absurdo. Atualmente, no uso freqüente e do senso comum, sofisma é qualquer raciocínio caviloso ou falso, mas que se apresenta com coerência e que tem por objetivo induzir outros indivíduos ao erro mediante ações de má-fé." (Fonte Wikipedia)

Outra coisa que me assustar e não quero nem mencionar, de onde veio essa de contar uma mentira mil vezes e ela se torna verdade. De um movimento triste que matou 50 milhões de pessoas. Vemos essa arte de enganar novamente se repetir.

É que as pessoas mentem com tanta facilidade nas boates GLS, no chat/bate papo. Que tudo isso se torna uma banalidade.

Sei que é chato, talvez seja chato demais eu ficar aqui só falando defeitos do meio. Mas se é verdade porque então vou esconde-os com a peneira. Como muitos o fazem. Isso aqui não é a Disneylandia. É mais pura realidade.

Assim como os políticos prometem, iludem a população e nunca realizam o prometido. A grande maioria do meio faz o mesmo. É claro, volto a dizer, que nem todos são assim. Mas são peças raras, pessoas que são corretas com as outras.

Já que estamos falando de políticos e gays. Espero que os cariocas gays, bi, e homo, não se iludam, como esse tal Bispo Crivella que se faz de bom moço. Lembrem-se que ele é contra os homossexuais, mas agora virou amigo de todos, com segundas intenções. Então votem em qualquer candidato a prefeito. E não votem no Bispo Crivella. Pelo amor de Deus.

Então após falar de políticos e gays, ambos lobos em pele de cordeiro. Vamos ouvir a música "Cedo ou Tarde" da banda NXZero.

Um abraço a todos