Head on over to the article to find out.

H/T to Neptunus Lex

I did want to write a little something though. I went out trail riding with Julie, her husband and some of her friends the other day. I did this with a sprained ankle mind you, because I'm dumb and don't understand what the word "rest" means. Lol. The trail ride was fun... god the florida heat is so humid. Sickly humid. I ate and drank lots of water before I went but I was literally dying by the time we were done. Not to mention Fancy worked herself up into a sweat about an hour in. She was being a tad bit bratty though.

It was alot of fun because I haven't went trail riding in forever, and it's hard to find people who trail ride without riding western, because I don't like western all that much. There were a few awfully cute turtles along the way, alone with some weird looking bugs that had 5 inch long wings and thoraxes. Extremely scary. Aside from that, and the heat trying to kill me, it was extremely pleasant.

For the 4th of July we had some friends from Miami stay with us. It was really fun. We spent the weekend relaxing, hanging out and celebrating. We went down to city walk and wandered to the Hard Rock Cafe to see the fireworks. They were beaaaautiful.. yet short, because we failed to get there on time. We went on a mission/adventure for fireworks, and we even had our own (Which chris proceeded to abruptly light and toss out the car window at any given time) that we were dying to play with. After toiling through the busy and jam packed drive-in parking garage (not that there's any other way to get into a parking garage except driving) we just got the the little river thing in time to see about 5 minutes of fireworks. The journey and the dinner beforehand were fun, so I guess that's all that matters.

Then we met some people who were visiting from Ireland. They were fun to drink and hang out with until the girl decided to book it and be a weirdo, leaving her boyfriend behind. Therefore he took off after her, and we never got a chance to get their numbers for the glorious beach/surfing trip we attempted to plan the next morning. Oh well. After we got home, we proceeded to jump the gate to the pool, where I sprained my ankle. Funny though, I didn't feel the effects until a week later... and it took that long to swell. It's better now though.

And on another note, my cute little subjects, the ducks, were shot again. This time I managed to get the babies as grown ups. If you saw my last set of pictures, there were some little itty bitty cute and fluffy ducklings following their mom. Now they're grown up and ADORABLE! All the pictures are in my flickr, and I was kind of too lazy to edit any of them except three... but here's a taste of them.

Click the one below, it's really big and pretty but I have a feeling wordpress is gonna chop off the side of it. If you click it (or any of the pictures for that matter) they'll open in a new window.

ANNNND in this one below, it looked like one duck is attempting to kill the other via beak, but they're really just pruning eachother.

aaand I'll throw in one more. LOOK! CUTENESS PADDLING IN THE WATER!

Enjoy :) and wish the best for my dad please.

Meet Ezra Welch, a 40-year-old guy living in Berlin. He loves Batman so much, he has dedicated everything in his life to the caped crusader.

The collection is a diverse one, ranging from framed movie posters to a utility belt and even a large ceramic cookie jar shaped like Batman. He has even deemed one corner of the collection a "Rogues Gallery" and uses it to showcase Batman's foes.

Welch, who works at Precision Graphics in East Berlin, doesn't know exactly how much he has spent on his collection over the years but estimates it is at least $5,000, maybe even $10,000.

Even with all the money he has spent, he says his favorite item didn't cost him a thing.

"It's a Batrock," he says, pointing to a chunk of stone he got during a visit to the cave used to film part of the 1960's "Batman" TV show that starred Adam West. "It's from the Batcave. I don't know if anyone else has something like this."

Wow. And like all Batman fans, he seems to relish wearing the costume at the wrong and inappropriate times.

Occasionally he will even don a full-size Batman costume, though he prefers to do it to mark special events; one photo on the wall of the "Batcave" features him, fully-costumed, kissing his wife in front of their Christmas tree.

Yeah, but does he molest retired stagehands while wearing it?

Today's silly stuff deals with the concept of flight, or failure to fly, or reasons not to fly.

This illustrated story of office workers saving ducklings is pretty funny, and cute as well. In fact, it comes from Cuteoverload.com . Ducklings can't fly. They can plummet off the side of a building, and they can waddle, but they can't fly. Fortunately, there were people around to help these particular ducklings survive the plummeting and the waddling. Let's hope the ducklings grow up to be smarter than their mom.

Rabbits normally don't fly, but in Denmark, bunnies do take to the air in the sport of show jumping.

Finally, David Owen writes about a fantasy airline. It won't cost you $50 to read about it, although he'd probably like that very much.

I mentioned before I was wondering about the color genetics of my now two-month-old "baby" ducks. I re-read the color section in Holderread's book (Storey's Guide to Raising Ducks), and now I think I understand. So, I crossed a black Runner hen with a silver Magpie drake. Black x Silver always results in 100% blue offspring. So, these guys are technically "blue" ducks, and this cross will always give me this pattern.

The genetics of the black, blue, silver color crosses are as follows:
Blue x blue = 25% black, 50% blue, 25% silver
Blue x black = 50% black, 50% blue
Blue x silver  = 50% blue, 50% silver
Black x Silver = 100% blue
He doesn't say what Silver x Silver produces, but I'm guessing 50% blue, 50% silver?

So, as subsequent generations of these blues mix with each other, or mix with the two Silver drakes I have now, I'm going to get all three colors in the future!

I wondered about their tiny black spots. The book explains that in the blue coloring (which is a dilute of black) typically some black "leaks through." Of course, all will always have some pattern of white, since both the Magpies and Runners carry that gene.

Here are my Magpie drakes, father and son. The son is very pretty, and I understand good markings are hard to get on Magpies. I said I'd never show my ducks, but I may change my mind about him! If only I can find out how you get them clean for the show table! I need some advice there.

I'm pleased with the crossbreeds; I wasn't sure I was going to want crossbreeds at first. But I'm beginning to reflect that pure Runners are too delicate for dog work; and the Magpies are too heavy and slow. The cross makes an agile duck that's still robust enough to resist injury. I'm also having better luck with the viability of the eggs-both times, I've had more crossbred eggs survive than the purebred Magpie eggs. Hybrid vigor?

My platoon had drawn the duty as the interior guard for the post. That meant that we would post sentries on the Division Ammunition Supply Point and the divisions maintenence facility to prevent pilferage. Guard is a total pain. You have to get your best fatigues pressed and make sure all your gear is squared away. It means 24 hours of little sleep and incredible boredom. And of course, we pulled guard on a Sunday. Pretty much spoiled the weekend.

Just as we were getting inspected prior to assuming the guard, word came down that there was a wildfire out by the ammo supply point and that the post fire department needed extra bodies to help fight it. Guess who got picked. We quickly loaded up on a truck and headed out. It was a pretty goodly sized fire. At first we were fighting it on an open plain with short grass. Not too bad. Then the wind shifted and it got into a small wooded ravine and went crazy. While we were down in the ravine, fighting the fire with picks and shovels, we finally got some support. One of the division Blackhawk helicopters had a "bambi bucket" to dump water on the flames. The only problem was he kept dropping it on us and not the fire. I complained to one of the guys next to me. "That's nothing" he said, "Back at Ft. Polk, they'd drop the bucket loads on us. When they filled the buckets in the lake, they'd pick up water moccasins. Nothing like being dropped a hundred feet to piss off a snake!"

And, here are a couple of pictures of egg candling. I found that I don't need a fancy device, just a strong flashlight, and cupping my hand in a "C" shape between the light and the egg does the trick. First, an infertile egg: you can see the yellow yolk in there, and no blood vessels at all-- this one never started growing.

 This next photo shows a fertile egg on day 26- the egg is completely dark, full of duckling, except for the air pocket at the top, which has grown quite large.

(MyHomeIdeas) -- If you're wondering why your house has languished on the market for all these months, check out our tongue-in-cheek guide to common mistakes sellers make

Don't try to hide things inside stoves or cupboards, experts say. Potential buyers usually look everywhere.

1. Leave out your pictures, magazines, books, and knickknacks. You want a prospective buyer to feel that they know you, right?

Wrong. You want the buyers to immediately begin imagining themselves living in your house, and they'll have a hard time seeing beyond the pictures of your family at Beaver Creek and the old issues of Gun & Garden.

Even worse, they might find your taste in books laughable or your choice of evening wear tacky and decide they couldn't possibly live in your house.

So clear every surface, every side table, every coffee table, the sideboard, the desk and the dining room table. You can put one item in each room, and it should be a plant or flowers.

2. Don't change the cat litter. After all, you changed it yesterday, right? It doesn't smell that bad yet.

Or.....give your house the sniff test. It should smell fresh and clean. Nothing is more off-putting to a prospective buyer than a house that's stale-smelling, or worse.

Often, you become so inured to the smell of your own home that you don't notice scents that might offend a visitor. Empty the garbage cans, load dirty clothes into the washing machine, run a lemon through the disposal, give wood furniture a quick swipe with polish, and for goodness sake, change the litter box.

3. Express yourself! Indulge in your favorite colors in vividly painted walls and furniture. Paint an accent wall a bright color. It's fun!

Or...make your house a place anyone could imagine making their own. This means removing most evidence of your own personality. Decorate with a rigorous devotion to beige.

Neutral walls, pale furniture, soft lighting, and inoffensive art all go a long way towards creating a crowd-pleasing interior. Remove your collections to a safe place for the duration of the selling process, since you want a prospective buyer to look at the space, not get distracted by your Beanie Baby collection.

4. Stash your dirty magazines and movies in your oven or drawers! No one will open them to look inside.

Oh, yes they will. Get rid of everything you wouldn't want your mother to see. Prospective buyers will open the oven, investigate drawers for function and capacity, and study your closets and your medicine cabinet.

Part of preparing your house to sell is a ruthless purging of all these places and a thoughtful review of potentially embarrassing items in your house. If your bedroom is your personal love palace, remove any evidence of your rollicking sex life, at least temporarily.

5. Leave your furniture arranged as it is. That way people can see how much you can fit into the room!

Or....remove those extra pieces of furniture that make a room livable but add to the sense of clutter -- side tables, foot stools, magazine racks, and rocking chairs, which take up more space than a fixed chair. Create simple arrangements with maximum impact.

Often people arrange their living room as if they're hosting the neighborhood watch association meeting, with all the furniture lined up along the walls. Instead, place a sofa facing the fireplace, and flank it with two chairs facing a coffee table in between. This will create visual depth and an inviting vignette.

6. Make sure buyers know your team loyalties. Don't forget to fly that Red Sox flag!

Or...put your fan-of-the-year behavior on hold for a while, and stash your team merchandise away in the attic. What if your best prospect is a Yankee's fan? You don't want to lose a buyer over a big sponge #1 finger. The same goes for religious paraphernalia, although that may actually be less of a deal-breaker than the wrong team loyalty.

7. Don't worry about the breakfast dishes in the sink. People will understand you were in a rush to get out the door that morning.

Or....they'll think you're a slob who couldn't be bothered to put the dishes in the dishwasher, and probably hasn't taken very good care of the house. Other people's dirty dishes are especially revolting, and conjure images of squalor. If it means you have to take your family out to breakfast, make sure you leave the kitchen pristine. My Home Ideas: Company-ready kitchen

The same goes for the bathroom. Dry the inside of the sink and the surrounding counter completely before you leave the house.

8. Let the buyer fix the hole in the wall and the broken light fixture. They may want to choose their own!

Or...be prepared to lose a sale over the poor condition of your house. Everything in your house must be in good working order before you put it on the market. This process can take a couple of months, but you need to fix all broken fixtures, change all burned out light bulbs, repair any flaws in the walls, and refresh any paint that needs it.

The same goes for outdated or worn wallpaper. Some things do not get better with age, and nothing dates a room more than eighties wallpaper. My Home Ideas: Painting over wallpaper

9. Leave the yard as is. After all, it's the house they're coming to see!

Or...learn to see your yard an extension of the house, and give it a thorough once-over. Trim unruly bushes, pull weeds, spread fresh mulch, and keep it mowed.

Your yard sets the expectations of the buyer before they've even stepped in your house. Consider installing attractive outdoor lighting. It goes a long way, for a little investment, toward creating a dramatic mood. And if you have a dog, go on a hunt for "land-mines" and clean them up.

10. Leave your dog in his crate while people look at your house. He's well-behaved.

Or...he's not so well-behaved when you're not there and strangers are tromping through his house. Nothing is so distracting as a barking dog when prospects are trying to get a detailed look at your house. Even though he might be contained, his voice will carry. Take him with you if you can, or drop him at a pet-friendly neighbor's house and repay them with house-sitting or a similar service.

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The new arrangement in the National Hockey League has the Penguins playing 64 games within the Eastern Conference, and 18 more against Western Conference opponents. Every team will play every team this season.

And yes, we can finally say THIS SEASON.

Alexander Ovechkin and Sidney Crosby will meet each other early in the season in '08, as the Washington Capitals make their first visit on October 16th. The series really means nothing between them, being that Sid has a clear advantage in in the win column, however it it always fun to watch two of the best players in the league go at it.

Just two days later, be prepared for the Maple Leaf fans to make their first invasion of the Mellon Arena. If you've been to a home game against the Leafs, you know how terribly annoying the games with Toronto can be if the Penguins are losing. It turns in to a veritable home game the boys up north.

Me and my family went for my father's birthday in Crosby's rookie season when ticket sales were still struggling. There were so many of them there that it was hard to pick out Pittsburgh fans. They were so obnoxious that I took one of their flags and broke it in half. Let's just say that Geno's hat trick last year was sweet revenge.

In Novemeber the Penguins make a swing around some of the Western Conference, and land in Detroit on November 11th. Mark your calendars for this one. It proves to be as heated a game as any, especially since number 18 will be in red and white.

The BIG one happens February 8th. Detroit comes to town for a 3 p.m. game that will likely be on NBC. I hope to be there, and I expect an atmosphere very close to that of the Stanley Cup Finals.

The miniature Penguins, also known as the Tampa Bay Lightning, will bring their host of former 'Guins to Mellon Arena on December 23rd. As much hate as there will be against Detroit, there should be just as much opposite respect in the game against the Lightning. It'd be far to hard to boo the likes of Ryan Malone and Gary Roberts.

Western Conference teams that visit Pittsburgh are the Edmonton Oilers, Minnesota Wild, Vancouver Canucks, Anaheim Ducks, Columbus Blue Jackets, Detroit Red Wings, San Jose Sharks, Los Angeles Kings and Calgary Flames.

Games against the Western Conference at home have always lack atmosphere at the Igloo. Hopefully the new schedule this season will revamp those matchups. It will be cool to watch Vancouver and Calgary come to town, teams that I haven't seen in years.

Finally, here are the Pens vs. Flyers dates:

Tuesday Oct. 14 - Flyers @ Penguins, 7 p.m.

Thursday Nov. 13 - Flyers @ Penguins, 7:30 p.m.

Saturday Dec. 13 - Penguins @ Flyers, 1 p.m.

Tuesday Jan. 13 - Penguins @ Flyers, 7 p.m.

Saturday Feb. 21 - Penguins @ Flyers, 1 p.m.

Sunday March 22 - Flyers @ Penguins, 3 p.m

Mark your calendars.

*Update 7/17/08 @ 1:26 p.m.

If you have trouble reading the schedule at NHL.com, here is the version from penguins.com:

Sat., October 4^th @ Ottawa, 2:30 PM (Sweden)
Sun., October 5^th vs. Ottawa, 2:30 PM (Sweden)
Sat., October 11^th vs. New Jersey, 7:30 PM
Tue., October 14^th vs. Philadelphia, 7:00 PM
Thur., October 16^th vs. Washington, 7:30 PM
Sat., October 18^th vs. Toronto, 7:00 PM
Mon., October 20^th @ Boston, 7:00 PM
Thur., October 23^rd vs. Carolina, 7:30 PM
Sat., October 25^th @ New York Rangers, 7:00 PM
Tue., October 28^th @ San Jose, 10:30 PM
Thur., October 30^th @ Phoenix, 10:00 PM
Sat., November 1^st @ St. Louis, 8:30 PM
Thur., November 6^th vs. Edmonton, 7:30 PM
Sat., November 8^th @ New York Islanders, 7:00 PM
Tue., November 11^th @ Detroit, 7:00 PM
Thur., November 13^th vs. Philadelphia, 7:30 PM
Sat., November 15^th vs. Buffalo, 7:30 PM
Tue., November 18^th vs. Minnesota, 7:00 PM
Thur., November 20^th @ Atlanta, 7:00 PM
Sat., November 22^nd vs. Vancouver, 1:00 PM
Wed., November 26^th @ New York Islanders, 7:00 PM
Fri., November 28^th @ Buffalo, 7:30 PM
Sat., November 29^th vs. New Jersey, 7:30 PM
Wed., December 3^rd @ New York Rangers, 7:00 PM
Thur., December 4^th @ Carolina, 7:00 PM
Sat., December 6^th @ Ottawa, 7:00 PM
Mon., December 8^th vs. Buffalo, 7:30 PM
Wed., December 10^th @ New Jersey, 7:00 PM
Thur., December 11^th vs. New York Islanders, 7:30 PM
Sat., December 13^th @ Philadelphia, 1:00 PM
Thur., December 18^th @ Atlanta, 7:00 PM
Sat., December 20^th vs. Toronto, 7:00 PM
Mon., December 22^nd @ Buffalo, 7:00 PM
Tue., December 23^rd vs. Tampa Bay, 7:30 PM
Fri., December 26^th @ New Jersey, 7:00 PM
Sat., December 27^th vs. Montreal, 7:00 PM
Tue., December 30^th vs. Boston, 7:30 PM
Thur., January 1^st @ Boston, 7:00 PM
Sat., January 3^rd vs. Florida, 1:00 PM
Mon., January 5^th @ New York Rangers, 7:00 PM
Tue., January 6^th vs. Atlanta, 7:30 PM
Thur., January 8^th @ Nashville, 8:00 PM
Sat., January 10^th @ Colorado, 3:00 PM
Tue., January 13^th @ Philadelphia, 7:00 PM
Wed., January 14^th vs. Washington, 7:30 PM
Fri., January 16^th vs. Anaheim, 7:30 PM
Sun., January 18^th vs. New York Rangers, 3:00 PM
Tue., January 20^th vs. Carolina, 7:30 PM
Wed., January 28^th vs. New York Rangers, 7:30 PM
Fri., January 30^th @ New Jersey, 7:00 PM
Sat., January 31^st @ Toronto, 7:00 PM
Tue., February 3^rd @ Montreal, 7:30 PM
Wed., February 4^th vs. Tampa Bay, 7:30 PM
Fri., February 6^th vs. Columbus, 7:30 PM
Sun., February 8^th vs. Detroit, 3:00 PM
Wed., February 11^th vs. San Jose, 7:30 PM
Sat., February 14^th @ Toronto, 7:00 PM
Mon., February 16^th @ New York Islanders, 2:00 PM
Thur., February 19^th vs. Montreal, 7:00 PM
Sat., February 21^st @ Philadelphia, 1:00 PM
Sun., February 22^nd @ Washington, 3:00 PM
Wed., February 25^th vs. New York Islanders, 7:30 PM
Fri., February 27^th @ Chicago, 8:30 PM
Sun., March 1^st @ Dallas, 3:00 PM
Tue., March 3^rd @ Tampa Bay, 7:30 PM
Thur., March 5^th @ Florida, 7:30 PM
Sun., March 8^th @ Washington, 3:00 PM
Tue., March 10^th vs. Florida, 7:30 PM
Thur., March 12^th @ Columbus, 7:00 PM
Sat., March 14^th vs. Ottawa, 3:00 PM
Sun., March 15^th vs. Boston, 3:00 PM
Tue., March 17^th vs. Atlanta, 7:30 PM
Fri., March 20^th vs. Los Angeles, 7:30 PM
Sun., March 22^nd vs. Philadelphia, 3:00 PM
Wed., March 25^th vs. Calgary, 7:30 PM
Sat., March 28^th vs. New York Rangers, 1:00 PM
Wed., April 1^st vs. New Jersey, 7:30 PM
Sat., April 4^th @ Carolina, 7:00 PM
Sun., April 5^th @ Florida, 5:00 PM
Tue., April 7^th @ Tampa Bay, 7:30 PM
Thur., April 9^th vs. New York Islanders, 7:30 PM
Sat., April 11^th @ Montreal, 7:00 PM

Home games in BOLD

All start times are in Pittsburgh time.

She's moved on from that and had success with Forgetting Sara Marshall and joined the cast of Heros.

But the real reason she graces our pages today? How can you not like a girl that does the golden Leia bikini?

Our tale starts on Table VII, which is the dress rehearsal. You first fire a couple of rounds to confirm your zero- that is, making sure the sights of the gun actually point to where the rounds will go. Then you drive from station to station, engaging targets. Some are engaged from a stationary position, and some on the move. After you've done this, you go back and do it all again. At night.

On this particular night, A-11 had the duty as “the spotter”. When crews would zero their main gun, we would help them spot the shot to tell how well their sights were aligned. The target was a large square board on a pop up target. Normally, when you hit a pop-up, down it goes. They have a mechanical lifter to raise it for your next shot.

I'd been spotting shots all night, from just after sundown until almost 3am. Finally, it was our turn to go. After a mechanical problem with the zero target was solved-which led to “The Great Hot Mic Frab-up”(but that's a story for another time), the range was hot, and we were cleared to zero. One small problem. While we had been fooling around waiting for the folks in the tower to raise the zero target, an elk had decided this was a fine time to graze. Right next to the zero target.

Now, one of the things you hear at every single range safety briefing is this, “Don't shoot the wildlife!” In fact, post policy called for a cease fire. Shooting the wildlife is a major no-no. It was a good way to lose stripes and a goodly portion of your pay. So, I called in to the tower and told them that a large herbivorous mammal was standing next to the target. There was some hemming and hawing and cogitating going on up there. We were running out of nighttime. We had to finish up pronto, shoot at night, and clear the range so the next company could come in and start their runs. Eventually, the call came from the tower, “Pop a round down there to scare him off.” I looked at LT K. LT K looked at me... What were they smoking up there? After a brief conversation with the controllers in the tower to confirm they were in fact in possession of their faculties, LT K and I decided to proceed. We had just zeroed the gun that morning, and I was pretty certain the sights hadn't drifted at all. This particular track held its zero very well. The decision was made to just put one round through the zero target to confirm, and since that was right by the elk, maybe it would scare him away.

Select Single Shot AP. Manual Safety Off. Electrical Safety Off. Ghost round cycled. Sights on target. LT K gives his fire command. I respond with, “On the way” and squeeze the triggers. CRACK.

Down goes the zero target.

And down goes the second elk standing right behind it. The one nobody saw.

And who knew ducks could be so friendly/annoying (for the record, ducks prefer texas toast over lettuce):

The ducks did eventually complain about my smoking but fuck the ducks, the view was still nice:

*ahem*

Anyway, I read with much sorrow today that there has been a recall of a shitload of LeanPockets, the "diet" spinoff of HotPockets.

About 200,000 pounds of the products, a spinach artichoke chicken package with two sandwiches, are affected.

This prompted a recall of the greatest stand up skit not featuring the late George Carlin (PBUH):

Anyway, what's a lad to do while waiting out the recall? Here are a few suggestions:

Ponder whether or not Batman could really exist.

What's most plausible about portrayals of Batman's skills?
You could train somebody to be a tremendous athlete and to have a significant martial arts background, and also to use some of the gear that he has, which requires a lot of physical prowess. Most of what you see there is feasible to the extent that somebody could be trained to that extreme. We're seeing that kind of thing in less than a month in the Olympics.

Thanks to Wisergenius for the above.

Go out and exercise.

Steve Striker of Edwardsville planned to eat at least 24 doughnuts. He was working on 20 doughnuts when he reached the Worden pit stop.

"I don't think I'll make my goal. It's tough to hold it back now," Striker said as he was shoving five doughnuts into his mouth.

First-time participant Blake Stevens of Edwardsville said the ride was fun.

"I got to see some guy puke after eating 25 doughnuts, so that was interesting," Stevens said.

Cope with the InBev buyout of A-B:

Q: What should I drink instead?

A: You have several options. You can drink Miller Lite, which is fucking terrible. You can also drink Coors Light, which is also fucking terrible. But at least Coors Light is an offical sponsor of the NFL. Also, when you open a Coors Light, a big fucking silver train comes from out of nowhere! And you can see your breath! And girls with big tits show up out of thin air! Awesome.
...
Whatever you do, DO NOT drink any Belgian beer. Belgium is renowned for making delicious dubbels and trappist ales that make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. THIS IS A TRAP. It’s right there in the name: “trap”pist. You know who makes those beers? Bloodthirsty Belgian monks, who employ the beer as a sedative before FUCKING THEIR VICTIMS UP THE ASS. You keep that Chimay away from my family, you perverts.

Or, you could engage in some "bonding" with the USC Football Team.

You could drive scooters in Columbus, OH (I hear that is popular with some on this site).

It's difficult to get an exact estimate as to how many scooters are being operated around the city, but some estimates are as high as 3,000.

"With the fuel injection engines, it should get about 100 miles per gallon under normal use," Beam said.

But there are drawbacks.

Scooters are now mixing into the flow of traffic.

Dave Hughes and his wife have started riding scooters to and from work.

"It's more of a respect thing and 'you're in my way kind of thing,'" Hughes said.

But as the price of gasoline remains high, scooters may not always be the vehicles that are "in the way."

"We've been absolutely inundated (with a) 35 scooter backorder right now," Beam said.

With a higher demand than supply, Central Ohioans should expect to see more and more of them as more are built and available.

Or, you could hang out with some Canadian Football Cheerleaders.

Folks, the choice is yours. Choose wisely.

No biggie, this. Lindstrom had some skill, but he was one of those guys who just never showed enough at the NHL level to earn a full-time slot. And as he was rumored to be on his way back to Europe this season -- well, even a conditional pick in the latter rounds is worth more than the nothing the Jackets would have gotten if he walked.

What's significant is that this is one more Doug pick out the door. I'm not totally in love with all of Howson's moves, but at least it's going to be far tougher to blame whatever happens next season on this still being Doug's team.

In other news that will probably pertain more to the Crunch than the Jackets, Derek MacKenzie was resigned, and Craig MacDonald was signed. Also, it appears Steve Kelly may have been signed.

Worship in my ugly, modernist shadow, Christ-humping Irish scum!

Of course, I did have to suffer a shade of buyer's remorse. For where in my unit was the vomitorium whereupon we purge between meal courses? Surely no hedonist's home is complete without it. The landlord calmly explained that no such vomitorium as I described it ever really existed, not even when I was Caesar of Rome—the idea was nothing but pure misconception, he said. I took the opportunity of his open mouth to deliberately regurgitate a half-digested duck confit entree into his face to make a point, and bid him to clean up the resulting mess, for as Seneca writes: Cum ad cenandum discubuimus, alius sputa deterget, alius reliquias temulentorum [toro] subditus colligit — "When we recline at a banquet, one [slave] wipes up the spittle; another, situated beneath [the table], collects the leavings of the drunks."

And though I did not drool, I was supremely hammered at the time, and most of my "leavings" did end up under a Mies van de Rohe glass coffee table. Luckily or not, my landlord happened to be a rare emetophiliac, which meant he found the whole barfing display erotic and arousing.

I can't say I found the sight of duck goo and bile in his mustache quite as enticing, even after licking some off.

—Caligula

Ducks!, originally uploaded by William WM.

]]> http://selmainthecity.wordpress.com/?p=501 Tue, 15 Jul 2008 13:27:32 +0000 Selma http://selmainthecity.wordpress.com/?p=501

This afternoon Nick and I did one of our favourite things - we went down to Victoria Park and fed the ducks. This is a park next to the University with a lovely lake and a huge colony of ducks, moorhen and the occasional goose and swan. Many, many people visit every day. The ducks are extremely well fed and very sociable.

Nick is sure that this particular duck remembers him and comes up to greet him each time we visit the park. It is true that there is always one duck who approaches us first. He also likes to be fed by hand.

As Nick was feeding the ducks a little boy joined us, aged about three. We gave him some bread and showed him how to break it up and sprinkle it. He was a dear little boy and kept saying "Billy loves ducks. Billy loves ducks." His mother was nineteen years old and was studying for her Higher School Certificate because she dropped out of school when she was pregnant. She was finding it difficult to study as her son didn't sleep well, so she rarely had consistent periods of time to herself. She lived alone in a one bedroom flat on the main road. Most of her neighbours had parties every night of the week which lasted until all hours. She came to the park every day because it offered her solace. 'A little bit of earth in the midst of the city' was how she described it.

Billy grew very excited when he saw Nick feeding the duck. 'You're bwave,' he said over and over. Just before he and his mother left I ran over to the shop across the road that had one of those booths where you can print out your digital photos and printed all the photos of the ducks out for Billy. His mother left with tears in her eyes.

I watched her go, her thin shoulderblades sticking through her T-shirt, trying to respond with animation to Billy's chattering. How hard it must be to be 19 and alone, with a three-year old child. Yet she didn't complain. She conducted herself with such dignity I was humbled.

These two ducks followed us right around the lake. One of them is the original duck who approached us when we arrived, the duck Nick swears knows him.

'She's a beauty, isn't she?' A man named Malcolm came and sat with us, carrying five loaves of French bread and a six pack of beer. He was referring to the goose. 'She a feisty one is old Lucy. Watch out, cause she nips.'

Malcolm comes to the park every afternoon with his beer and his bread to feed the ducks. He regards them as his family. He will sometimes sit and watch them and talk to them for three or four hours, going home as twilight falls to an evening of sketching what he has seen. He lives in singleman's quarters across the road with a shared kitchen and bathroom. His fellow residents call him the Bird Man.

'You can learn a lot from birds,' he says. 'Like how to care for others. The birds, they all stick together, the mothers don't abandon their young, no one is left in the lurch. They swim together, they eat together, they sleep together. It's a community effort. If humans were more like that we wouldn't have the problems we have.'

Malcolm loves the park. It is an essential part of his day. It made me realise how important green open spaces are in urban environments. We work. We live in little boxes. We come out into the open air to breathe and talk and remember that we're alive.

In under an hour I had two meaningful conversations with perfect strangers. I felt youthful, carefree as I stood in the sun laughing at the ducks waddling and splashing. The park gave us respite from the strains of city life, offering us a momentary haven, and a sudden surge of hope rising like voices in song.

Still, he knows that part of his hockey legacy is tied to his draft position.

"The only reason I continue to remember (being drafted No. 2 behind Crosby) is that everyone brings it up when I do an interview," he said with a laugh.

"To be picked anywhere in the first round is nice, but to be picked second is something special. It's something I'll always remember, and I'll always remember being picked second because of the guy who was picked ahead of me and how he continues to do great things. At the same time, it's kind of the year I've been looking forward to; hopefully I can make a name for myself."

Still, Ryan admits that his career development hasn't exactly been on the fast track. Part of the reason for his long development cycle owes to the fact that the Ducks didn't need to push him along the way the Penguins have done with Crosby

"It's been a little slower than I would have liked to come along, but at the same time, the main thing the Ducks try to stress is not to throw guys into situations they're not ready for. I've been kind of babied along, and sometimes that pays dividends in the long run. I hope that's the case for me -- that I can look forward from here.

"I think a lot of times when people say, 'Why haven't you been a regular in the last two years?' I just look at them and say, 'Where the heck was I going to play?' Where were they going to put me that I was really going to get to contribute? It's a very professional organization, where if you're a young guy coming in, the older guys take you under their wing. I'm sure not every organization can say that about their veterans. I've been blessed so far to have a good group and a good coaching staff that's made me feel comfortable. This year, hopefully, I get to put a little bit of a base around my career."

The Ducks are also optimistic that he's ready to break out.

"Bobby is huge to our future," Anaheim's Senior Vice President of Hockey Operations Bob Murray said. "He's ready to play in the NHL. He's had a little growing up to do, but he's gotten there now. There's been a lot of time and effort spent on him."

Murray cited last spring's AHL playoffs, when Ryan had 20 points in 16 games as Portland made the AHL conference finals, as a turning point.

"His playoffs were outstanding this year," Murray said. "He turned the corner and carried the team on his back."

Ryan has the build of a top-flight power forward. Murray feels he has the skills to match.

"For a big boy, he's got great hands. He'll score goals. On the power play, he's outstanding. Those are all huge things in today's game," Murray said. "He's still a little gangly, but power forwards can take some time. He still hasn't grown into his body. He's taken a little more time, but guys like that often do."

Ryan actually started last season with the Ducks, but breaking into the lineup of a defending Stanley Cup champion isn't easy. He had mixed feelings about ending up in Portland for most of the season.

"I was excited to go to a situation where I knew I was going to be the go-to guy, where I was going to get to play a lot of minutes," he said. "I looked forward to playing with (Portland coach) Kevin Dineen, and some of the guys who were in Portland I had friendships with. In that aspect, I was excited, but at the same time, you want to play at the highest level, and you want to continue to improve.

"I felt that every time I got up to Anaheim, things got a little bit better. I would have liked a little more of an opportunity, but they come as they go. This year, there's a different opportunity -- there are more openings and a spot for me there."

Like Murray, Ryan says his success in the AHL playoffs were a major breakthrough.

"They laid it on my shoulders," he said. "They said, 'Go to Portland and be that guy who carries the team. You never really did that at Owen Sound. It's something you've got to do here.' I kind of took that personally; I put it on my shoulders and made sure that things went well. Everybody stepped up their game throughout the run, but I took it personal when they said 'do it' -- I had to earn my place. I think I kind of did that a little bit."

One reason there's a spot is that the Ducks bought out Todd Bertuzzi this summer, creating an opening for Ryan. That's ironic, because Ryan lists Bertuzzi as the player he's modeled himself after.

"Todd Bertuzzi is the guy," he said. "I think we play similar styles -- we're both big and we like to control the puck and walk from the corners and find guys. We like the physical play as well. Having him around last year helped me a lot. Off the ice he was good to me. He helped me on the ice as well. I got a chance to play with him a few times, and we kind of worked well together. I appreciate everything he did."

One of those things was to help Ryan score his first NHL goal -- and the Ducks' first goal of the 2007-08 season, in their season opener against Los Angeles in London.

"A lot of that was him," Ryan said. "He and I were just hanging by the side of the net, and it was my first game in the League -- so who do you cover? Four guys went to him and I had a wide-open net. I thanked him for that one, too.

"He was great to me. I thanked him numerous times throughout the summer for everything. I told him I do look forward to playing against him. He would have been nice to have around, that's for sure."

There may be an opening in Anaheim that the Ducks want Ryan to fill, but the 21-year-old knows that nothing is going to be handed to him.

"If you look at the numbers, who's in and who's out … there's a spot in the top six and it's mine to earn," he said. "Randy Carlyle's not exactly the kind of coach who just gives things away. In my short time, I've learned that from him. I think if you work hard and earn your stripes and are respectful to him and the veterans, his respect level for you goes up. As long as you continue to work hard and, in my case, produce, that's going to be my area to lose."

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Of course not. She's a stupid, cold-hearted little troll. Be that as it may, the subject of one of her incoherent radio rants is dividing Packer nation.

Brett Favre, understandably, is having second thoughts about his retirement. I'm not sure how you can do something your whole life and then simply walk away from it. However, his tactics and timing leave much to be desired. The local fish wrapper published a very revealing time line this morning. He was given every opportunity to come back and when he finally, finally decided he was going to stay retired, the Packers went into the draft convinced they would be Favre-less. Now, he is waging a very un-subtle PR war with the Packers and I think its beneath him. I'm not sure you can imagine what a stir this has caused up here in the frozen tundra but trust me when I say about 50% of the fans have lost a little respect for Brett because of the way this is being handled.

The thing I love about this park is that it has some wildness to it, while being firmly set in the city. Some other time I'll write about all the features of the park and some of my favorite spots there. For now, I'll share about something that happened in the corner of the park I know best, Lake McNab, aka "The Duck Pond." 

A couple weeks ago I was walking the dog there when I met a woman, Elizabeth, who was intently watching two new ducks who'd come to the lake.  These weren't baby ducks (of which there are plenty this year. And they are cute!) They were a large black duck and a white duck - Muscovies, she told me, who'd been dumped there by someone who no longer wanted them as pets.

Elizabeth, from Mickaboo Bird Rescue, was there to determine how they were doing, and see if they would be able to thrive in a less domesicated environment than they were used to.  (I checked again today, and so far, they seem to be doing well!) You can check out her account of the afternoon - and see some other really great birds - on her blog, The Rescue Report.

What's your favorite "wild spot" in the City?

(www.SpiritInTheCity.com, www.InsideOutDesignCoaching.com)