"But later he loudly shares his thoughts on Alanis Morissette: I've always thought she was hot.  Someone challenges his view, citing Morissette's recent weight gain, and he rebuts: I don't care if she gains weight.  Her boobs just get bigger.  And I like that!"

Finally, a man who recognizes the good in a little weight gain.  The article made much of the fact that he's newly single.  He's pretty cute too.  And probably rich.  I wonder how one goes about meeting someone like him.

Let's hear it for Michael Buble shall we?

I have started part 7 of White Nights of St Petersburg-almost finished the top and have outlined the bottom 4 sections.  It goes pretty fast, so I am anxious to get to part 8.

Both pieces required learning to do Jessica stitches. They more difficult on Aida, since I had to split the weave with my needle, but I'm very happy with how they turned out.

As you can see on the Celtic piece, I've stitched my first moon. I decided to change the color from dark gold to a more silvery gold, so it looks like the moon instead of the sun. After I finish part 10, I'll stitch the moons in the rest of the forest quarters.

Don't be so pushy

Making a "birth plan" is about more than being prepared. It is about being in control. Here's why letting go of all that is way harder - and that much better.

In her article, Katrina explains that she was keen to develop a birth plan when her midwife told her that "the best plan is no plan at all". While she was initially uncomfortable with the idea of things being unknown and uncontrollable, she eventually embraced it and submitted to the experience of giving birth and had exactly the birth she wanted, without having planned for it. She also mentions the disappointment of women that plan every minute detail of their birth and then end up with an emergency c-section.

Midwives versus obstetricians

What Katrina perhaps didn't take into account though is that there is a substantial difference between the model of care of a midwife and the model of care of an obstetrician.  As Henci Goer explains in The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth, "whether you have a C-Section or any other procedure or medication in labour has little to do with your or your baby's condition. What happens to you depends almost entirely on your caregiver's practice style and philosophy".

For example, the Society of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists of Canada reports that more than 1 in 4 babies are delivered by C-Section. This is alarmingly high. The World Health Organization says any rate higher than 15 per cent signals inappropriate usage. I couldn't find a good statistic on the c-section rate for women whose primary caregiver was a midwife, but the midwives that I interviewed in my search for a birth attendant had a transfer rate of 6% to the hospital during childbirth, a portion of which would have ended up with a c-section. Much lower than with obstetricians!

Katrina had a midwife, so that was already a big step towards avoiding unnecessary procedures. Midwives view birth as a normal experience and epidural use, induction, c-section, vacuum or foreceps extraction, and many other procedures are less likely to be used in a birth where the midwife is the primary caregiver than in one where an obstetrician is the primary caregiver.

Being able to trust your birth attendant to make good decisions is important and can be helpful. I have one friend that had a birth plan for her first birth, but not for her second because she was using the same midwife and knew that they were in agreement about the type of birth she wanted, so she didn't need to write it down. If you agree with your birth attendant's philosophy and approach to birth, then maybe you don't need a birth plan and can "submit" to the experience and trust your birth attendant to guide things in the right direction.

Unfortunately, most women that have an obstetrician as their birth attendant (by choice or by default because it was the only option available to them), often find themselves in a "team care" situation. This means that whoever is on duty when they go into labour is the person that will deliver their baby. As if that isn't bad enough, that doctor will only show up for the last 5 minutes or so of the birth, leaving the patient with a resident, medical students, and nurses that they have never heard of and never met prior to being in labour. People rotate in and out of the room. You don't know them, you don't know their thoughts about birth, you don't know their personal experiences, and you don't know their aspirations. Perhaps the nurse attending your birth had two elective c-sections and thinks it is the best way to give birth. Perhaps the junior resident is really keen to pratice her skills with the vacuum extractor. Perhaps it is just so busy in the labour and delivery ward that evening that they tell you if you think you might want an epidural, you'd better get it now, even though you aren't feeling much pain yet.

In addition, obstetricians seem to approach birth as a medical condition that needs to be fixed and helped along, rather than something that is natural and normal and that will take place on its own time line. They approach problems that come up along the way with a series of high risk interventions, rather than considering low risk strategies for dealing with those problems. One high risk intervention, often leads to another. A woman's obstetrican may decide she needs to be induced even though her body isn't ready to give birth. They may first try breaking her membranes, which puts the birth on a timeline (the hospital often must deliver the baby within 24 hours of breaking the membranes due to risk of an infection). If breaking the membranes doesn't get things moving, they may use drugs to move it along. The induction can cause very painful contractions which may result in the recommendation of an epidural. The epidural means that the woman can no longer feel what is going on in her own body and also cannot walk around and do other exercises that might help the birth move along. As a result, her progress may be slow and she might end up in an emergency c-section.

My own experience

The birth of my first child was not what I wanted. I used the approach Katrina suggested. I submitted to the care of my birth attendant, an obstetrician in a team environment at a hospital. I was scared of the pain and hadn't done much research about the birth or about the risks of various interventions. I didn't have a birth plan. I ended up with an epidural early in my labour when I wasn't experiencing any pain because the nurse said "if you want an epidural, you'd better get it now or it might be too late". I spent an uncomfortable night lying on a bed, restless and uncomfortable, hooked up to machines, waiting for things to move along. I was lucky that I didn't end up needing further interventions other than a vacuum extractor and my son was born the next morning. I was stuck in my bed after the birth, still unable to move around because of the epidural, really wanting a shower but not able to get up to have one. I couldn't get up to get a glass of water, to use the toilet, to change my son's diaper. I completely submitted to the care and decisions of my birth attendants and I wasn't happy.

For my second birth, I wasn't able to have a midwife (long and complicated story involving government red tape), so I opted for the same obstetrician environment, but decided to have a doula to provide support for a natural and normal birth. I knew that my doula would be there for my entire birth or on the odd chance that she couldn't be, I knew that her backup that I had also met would be there. She would be a consistent support for me, not part of a rotating cast of characters in the labour and delivery ward.  Through my own research and with the support and experience of my doula, I did develop a birth plan. I made sure that my doula and my husband were familiar with it. I reviewed it with the obstetrician that saw me during one of my last appointments. I ensured that every person that was involved in my care in the labour and delivery ward had a copy of my birth plan. The birth went exactly as planned. It was quick, I was comfortable, I was able to move around, and I wasn't offered and didn't need any medical interventions.

My Birth Plan

For those that are interested, here is a copy of my birth plan (with some personal details removed). There are lots of great resources online and books that can help you to develop a birth plan and I highly recommend doing your own research and discussing your findings with your birth attendant(s) as you develop your plan.

My name is _____ and I am accompanied by my husband ____. This is our birth plan for the birth of our second child (a baby girl named ___), due _______. We are hoping to have a natural and unmedicated birth with the assistance of our doula, _________ (or her back-up _______).

We are looking forward to working with the Doctor and staff to ensure we have a healthy baby. Below are our wishes for a normal and uncomplicated birth. If complications do arise we are open to making adjustments to our plan after we have been made aware of our options. We wish to have all procedures, tests and interventions explained and discussed prior to being performed if the situation allows.

First Stage

• Unmedicated birth: Please do not offer pain medication – I am aware of my options and will request pain medication if I choose to use it.

• Speeding up labour: I would like to avoid Pitocin. I would also like the amniotic sac to remain intact until it breaks naturally.

• Fetal monitoring: My preference is for intermittent external fetal monitoring.

Second Stage

• Choice of position for pushing: I would like to choose what position is most comfortable and appears to be yielding the best result. I may choose to change positions several times while pushing to increase comfort or improve the pace.

• Reduce Chance of Tearing: I would like to have a compress used on the perineum to reduce the chance of tearing.

Third Stage and First Hours After Birth

• Cord cutting: We would like to wait until the cord stops pulsing before it is clamped and cut. My husband does not want to cut the cord.

• Bonding/Nursing after Birth: Please place the baby directly on mom’s chest without washing and allow nursing as soon as possible. Please administer any necessary testing while the baby lies on mom’s chest. We prefer administration of eye ointment and vitamin K to be delayed until after the baby has had the opportunity to nurse.

• Checking for and releasing tongue tie: Our son was tongue tied and this significantly impaired our start at breastfeeding. Since tongue tie can be hereditary and we would like to avoid similar problems, if the baby does not latch on immediately after birth, we would like to have her tongue checked immediately and, if necessary, have the frenulum clipped as soon as possible.

• No artificial nipples or supplementation: We are planning to breastfeed. We would like to avoid all artificial nipples (bottles, pacifiers) and do not want the baby to receive any supplements (e.g. sugar water or formula).

• In event of unanticipated separation of mother and baby:
  In the event that mother and baby have to be separated after birth for any reason, I would like my husband to remain with the baby and to make all decisions regarding the baby’s care.

Concluding Thoughts

If nothing else, the process of developing a birth plan led me to research and think about what type of birth was best for me and my baby. It had nothing to do with frivolous wishes. It had everything to do with having the safest possible birth for both of us and avoiding unnecessary medical interventions.

That said, if someone did have wishes for their birth that I think are frivolous, I think that it is their right. Some people spend tens of thousands of dollars making every detail perfect for their wedding day and I would argue that the birth of a child ranks up there with a wedding among the most important days of a person's life, so if someone wants specific music playing, wants the lights dimmed, or wants a toast when all is said and done, then I think that is their right and it is better to think about it in advance and plan for it, than to have regrets later.

I didn't have a problem with the idea of things being uncontrollable or unknown, but I wanted to be prepared for the possibilities and wanted to understand the options available to me and the risks of various approaches prior to being in the labour and delivery ward. There is no WIFI there that I am aware of, so Googling things at the last minute was not an option!

If you know that your birth attendant will make the right decisions for you, then go ahead and skip the birth plan. But if you aren't certain that is the case, then plan plan plan and plan some more. And don't let Katrina Onstad tell you that you are being pushy.

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Gawker posted the Guidelines for Interns at the NYS and commented on the unreasonable stiff rules, including a commute of no more than half an hour:

Is this really the paper that celebrated Middle Eastern women who defiantly wear tight jeans, bikinis and punk-rock-inspired clothes under their burkas in the name of not being "dressed like everybody else?" And is the de facto ban on subway rides of more than 30 minutes coming from the same editors who slammed the mayor for taxing suburban commuters? Apparently so! Whether there's hypocrisy at work in them or not, the Sun's "Guidelines For Interns" are pretty hilarious, assuming you don't have to slave under them. Someone who did just sent us a copy, and we've highlighted some of the fun bits...

I finished part 6, the 4 corners.  I loved the big Jessica stitch in this one. I had never even heard of such a stitch before, but it is pretty simple and looks great!  I am so tempted to continue on and finish part 7, but I think I will switch to something else in the rotation, which would be Sunnia.

This section represents Spring, with leaves and blossoms on the trees.

 Well here is how far I am with St Pete.  I have all the yellow houses stitched, now I am just working on the backstitching.  I know i really shouldn't leave it all to the end, but at least I got half of them already done.  And it should go pretty fast.  I think I am getting really sick of working on this though.  I haven't spent this length of time on one project in a while, so I feel like I am getting burned out.  But I am committed to the Chatelaine Olympic goals.  I should finish part 5 with no problem, but I doubt I will finish my other 2 goals of finishing part 6 & 7. 

The kids started school last week.  Seems so early!  Julia is a sophmore and William is in 8th grade.  However he spends 1st period at the highs school as his teacher thought he was talented enough to be in it instead of the junior high band. Although he enjoys it, I think he would really like to be in high school all the time.  Both my kids hated jr. high- and I hated it right along with them.  Such a frustrating age.  Only one more year...

I didn't manage to stitch anything on Sunnia during the HAED SAL, so I am probably going to work on her next after the Olympics are over.  And then I get a new start-Yeahhhhh!!!!

I've taken a pic of one of the corners so far.

Don't get me wrong, the beads are gorgeous, and are absolutely going to make it when they're done.  It's just getting them done!!

I'm not a great beader I must confess.  Until I stitched MysteryX last year I'd never used beads or embellishments of any type on my stitching, so trust me to start with a biggie. 

You can't see very well on the pic, but in the blue corner medallions the beads or stitched as one dense block.  This is the bit I've had most trouble with.  My dense blocks are a big higgledy-piggledy.  Never mind.  I've unpicked and restitched and unpicked and restitched some more. This time it's staying.

I've done two of the corners, so am half way there...

In addition to this I've stitched and made up my exchange item for the Jaynes Attic Redwork or monochromatic exchange. Apparently I need more practice with the gluestick as well as the beading needle. Good job life is one big learning experience huh?

The exchange date for that is this week so I'll put some pics up then.
Meanwhile, back to those beads.

I finally figured out how to use the new photo stuff on wordpress.  Took me long enough huh?!!  Anyway-I have two things going on this weekend.  First, I have decided to stitch in the Chatelaine BB Olympics.  I hope to finish the yellow houses in round 5 and sections 6 and 7.  Probably a pretty lofty goal for just 16 days, but I will give it a whirl.  Course, it is also the HAED SAL weekend, so I will try and get some of Sunnia stitched too.

I was looking around the 'net today, and saw Stitchitandie's beautiful finished "B" from Mirabilia.  I love these new patterns.  My niece Emmaline has a birthday in October, and I would love to stitch an "E" for her as she is a girly girl.  But then I would have to break my 10 project challenge, which I really don't want to do.  I'll think about it a little longer and see if I can justify it!

And for those interested-it is a special day here today.  It is dh's 42nd birthday and being an very special date, he is feeling lucky.  He has purchased some lottery tickets-we'll see later if is reaallllly special or not!

I have occasionally heard beaders say that fingernail clippers work well for cutting their beading thread, as long as they are sharp.  And I have even seen those who use a dental floss container to drop their bobbin of Nymo into and then pull out and cut off the required amount using the device on the floss box.   Actually, that is probably a good idea if you are going to be carrying the beading supplies on an airline flight.

Since I haven't actually tried the nail clippers or dental floss container,  I'm going to stick to writing about scissors.  Doing bead work requires a small, sharp pair of embroidery scissors that have a good point for snipping close to the beads.  Get the best you can afford and guard against anyone using them for anything but cutting thread.  Don't cut paper with them!  Hide the scissors from family members if you have to.  They are always a temptation to others, especially the cute little ones that resemble storks, the tiny folding scissors, and the highly ornate chatelaines. All of these, when sharp, make clean, close cuts.  It is the beads we want to see, not the thread ends.  [There are links to see folding scissors and chatelaines; just click on those words above to see examples.  For some reason, the links don't show up well on this page.]

A clean thread, cut with sharp scissors allows the thread to pass smoothly through the eye of the needle.  Occasionally, a little spit helps here, too.

Small tweezers or larger forceps are also handy to have around because they can help you untangle knots and pick up individual beads, like when you accidentally drop that yellow bead into the orange bead box.

My scissors, tweezers, and forceps are pictured above along with a pair of earrings I made last year.

Ten teken van haar nijverheid droeg de vrouw een chatelaine met schaar, naaldenkoker en speldenkussen

I finally pulled out St Pete's and almost finished another house.  I didn't finish the backstitching on the 4th house, and decided to move to the next two.  I am so looking forward to moving on to the next section of this!

Next up is the HAED SAL, and I will be stitching on Sunnia (again).  Now I am out of the trees so to speak and get to stitch on the dragon!

The weather around here has been miserable.  It was 111 degrees on Monday and Tuesday.  Then with the dry heat and wind, a fire that is in the mountains to the east of us flared back up, so now we have heat and smoke.  Yuck.  I took some photos of the smoke in Chico with my new cell phone, but I have no idea how to download them here.  Someday I will learn.  I tried to get some pics of the red sun tonight as it was setting, but it lowered down into the smoke and disappeared before I could get out and take one!

I also started working on Blackstone Fantasy Garden from Ink Circles, and I've gotten a lot done during my Metro commute to and from work. This is going to be a gift for my Irish dance teacher, so I've changed to colors to go with our school dresses. The fabric is black and the main threads are Yonder Sky and Zaffre Cobalt from HDF. I'm using metallics for the blackwork areas.

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I ended up fussing with one of the colors a bit. The DMC conversion lists 370 as a replacement for Silk n Colors 155, so I did the first couple corners that way:

However, after looking at some other people's WIPs, I wasn't happy with how the color looked (it's the dark yellowish brown). I wanted some varigation, plus the color wasn't quite right.. So I bought some Gentle Arts Sampler Thread in Harvest Basket, which is almost an exact match to the original color. Here is the result, which I'm quite happy with:

I have at times loved and hated this. You hear how runners hit 'the wall' at a certain point when they run marathons. I hit the wall with this at about part 6. It disappeared down the side of the sofa for several months and I truly believed it would never see the light of day again. It's only when I found that I HAD to have Tuscany Town that I gave myself a good talking to and threatened that I couldn't have it until I'd revived this WIP.

So here it is.

Thankfully I ended up loving rather than hating. I think the corners and the border round the edge pulled it together for me. And I did enjoy the beading... once I'd stopped tying myself up in invisible thread.

The pic's very dark. I was a duff photographer even before the camera was out of action for weeks and weeks, so I can't blame the lack of practice, it's just me. This is why I usually do the stitching and let Trev do the snapping. He's still not happy with said camera after it's been on several jollies to the repairman, so least said soonest mended on that one. Just take the snaps myself and have done with it.

And so, the promised reward for the completed WIP - Tuscany Town Mandala. I have the silks, I have the beads, I have the fabby... just another dark photo to record for posterity and I can kick off.

I've been doing some work on Christmas Mystery V as well. I don't work on one part until it's done, I jump around and work on what I feel like working on.  This is a completed Part 5 (except for the beads of course).

The newest addition to my WIP pile (or mountain) is Martina Webber's Watergarden Mandala.  I've got this one on my lap frame, so I am going to do the beads as I go. 

Wedding season is coming up and I have been invited to a friend's wedding in July.  I am working on the Rose (because her name is Rose) from Marilyn Leavitt-Imblum's Tea Garden.  I am working on 36 count linen and I'll stitch their names and wedding date in gold Japan thread underneath the Rose.

Yesterday I completed the second part of the Victorian Secret Garden from Chatelaine Designs:

I came across a mention of Book of Ink Circles  (BoInk) in a blog and am definitely going to add it to the WIP pile.  I am going to do the gold frames in metallic Rainbow Gallery Petite Treasure Braid PB01.  I have the border on the corner done and the border of the first installment completed as well.   

A friend of mine is getting married this July and I am working on a piece for her.  Of course I ran out of the Glissen Gloss that is required and have to stop and wait for my order.  Once I finish the gift I'll post a pic and details on the pattern.  I really like the Glissen Gloss Rainbow 000 so I ordered two.  I also ordered more PB01 for BoInk. 

I was looking around Martina Webber's other designs and decided to order the Alhambra Garden kit (fabric, metalics, beads and pattern) from European Cross Stitch Company in California.  My favourite colour is blue, and there are a lot of blues in this one.  I have always wanted to do one of Martina's Gardens.

As part of my spree I ordered three A-Z books from Nordic Needle.  The two embroidery ones and one on Crewel work.  I like the idea of crewel work, but not working with wool.  I have seen crewel work done with cotton floss, so I'll probably try that at one point.  I found out about the A-Z series of reference books from the women at my guild, and am glad that I got a few.  The binding is coiled so it lies flat and the pictures demonstrating the stitches are really nice.  There is one on needlepainting that I have my eye on but I'll wait until the fall to get that one. 

Now I have to sit down and decide what I want to work on the most.  I don't really stick to a rotation on pieces that are just for me.  I'll have to organize my thoughts on that one. 

So today I've also ordered a piece of hand-dyed fabric from Polstitches to stitch the piece on. I'd not used the fabric viewer before, and I wonder how accurate the colours are? I did have a small piece of the fabric I've ordered, not enough to do a proper floss toss with, but enough to have a bit of a compare. Again, this is the first time I've stitched a big project onto hand-dyed fabric, so this whole thing is new to me.

But I'm looking forward to it. I'm just finishing off part 11 of last year's Mystery X which I've been stitching on white with the DMC conversion, and even that with its beads and crystals is very pretty and sparkly. And I invested in a tacky bob to help me with this, so hopefully this year I'll have learnt from my experience and there will be less of the bead pinging going on.

Now, bring on the fabby...