doing a coca-cola add

was feeling a little lost maybe it was the juice i had

my two favorite people.

the good and the bad!

being a little silly

]

imaginatiooooooon

imaginaaaaation

imagination

imaginaaaatiooon

imagination

imaginaaaatioon

imaginationnnn

imagination

:D

Today is a beautiful

i see a stranger on a motorcycle his sleeves are blowing in the wind its like music

I feel hearts dancing around me

I let the window down to share some love with the world

I saw a butterfly yesterday

it was a beautiful butterfly

and i thought of my soul sisters

and i imagined us

all butterflies

 flying together

 on

a beautiful sunny

 spring day

Thank you Lord for this day

for the air i breath

the love i feel

the love i give

thank you

for you

for me

for us

Lord I as a Warrior of the Light I do know that tragic things happen in the world from the beginning of time to the end of time, as these tragic things happen I am still touched with grief and compassion. I come to you humbled and ask that you bring comfort to family members that have lost a mother, father, son, daughter, sister, brother, grandmother, grandfather, friend.......

I ask that you heal those who have been injured,

those who maybe waiting for rescue that you stay with them and provide comfort till a helping hand comes and recover them.

Lord I ask that you wrapp your arms around this nation at this moment bring unity, love, calmness, and understanding in this moment of confusion and sadness.

For those who may read this blog feel free to add your prayer wishes.

Love, light, and Peace

Nika Bright Light Warrior

So I go through these different thoughts of things I could do different that would take away this creepy feeling of I'm tired of this life.

I thought about a trip to see my friend in Morocco for his wedding (the thought of Morocco makes me feel sad and my close friends would know why this is) hehehe

So I think about a trip to visit various friends and i still have that creepy feeling lingering inside of me.

I think about returning to the US. (oh hell no not right now not in this particular life time heheheheh just not ready yet)

I think about what if I won a million dollars (ummm nope still have that creepy feeling actually the feeling grows deep when I think of this cause one reason I'm sad is because I have the opportunity to make a lot more money but I don't want the job) One of thhe things I know for sure is that money don't bring happiness!

I think about going to see my sister for a while (ummm nope I love you Miko but I know you are about to have a transisiton soon and I wish one day we can really hook up and hang out just the two of us and the kids) They make me feel so happy! (maybe I could use a dose of hanging out with you and kids) Miss you and Love you!

Then I think about that article I read in Yoga Journal the other day while sitting on the toilet :P about the lady who was teaching english down in a village in South America (as my close friends know I have this passion to go down to South America after I leave the middle east and chill out until I'm ready for my next adventure).

As I think of myself down there teaching english learning from the people the culture growing more understanding more I feel that creepy feeling fade away from my mind and heart and I know...

I'm going into my room and i'm going to get down on my knees and speak to God!

Peace out

Love

Marie

 Is it for me to know? 

 orgasm addiction

addiction coffee

caffeine

energy

just thinking about him

i ask why

why

why

i get filled with wild thoughts of

why

So i'm contemplating

yes this blog is not filled with cheer

even though i take myself out of myself and I realize yes I'm happy

even with my situations

I'm alive

I'm living

I'm aksing

I'm striving

I'm smiling

I'm laughing

I am

mother

sister

friend

co-worker

lover

daughter

just some labels on a clothes pin that hangs from my clothes from time to time

i contemplate my thoughts and ask

do they make sense?

am I just wasting time thinking about

what is

Zen?

Hahahahaha (makes me laugh out loud)

Birthdays

anniversaries

Parties

Dancing

Dancing a dance to Heal

I question

what is he to me?

Teacher

friend

Brother

Son

Father

Lover

just some labels I decided I won't put on him

He simply

Is.

Thousands of years ago, Solomon wrote the following words: "Whatever has been is that which will be; And whatsoever has been done is that which will be done; And there is nothing new under the sun" (Ecclesiastes 1:9).

Just wanted to share with you all out there. click here Warrior of The Light  to check out the rest. Or Paulo Coelho Blog

Much love and light

Marie 

So many would say, "well, leave if it is that bad"! Well, if i leave that means leaving Qatar, leaving my friends, leaving my boyfriend, leaving a life I have outside of my job. It makes me sad thinking about leaving everyone.

But my heart is starting to take over. My mind has put up a battle trying to be LOGIC about all of this.

Mind: be financially secured, make sure you know where you want to go after you leave Qatar, you have a big promotion that is approaching are you sure you want to turn that opportunity down? Marie don't make any mistakes. You know you do not want to return back home to St. Petersburg all that is there are people that are guaranteed to work your nerves and too much sadness.

Now my heart is jumping in

Heart:    mind you have put up this fight too long and i have given you your way for the past two years, now its my turn to have some fun!!! Don't worry dear, everything is going to be alright. Hasn't the Lord always taken care of you in all situations?

"Yes"! is my reply

Heart:   So why is that you are afraid its time for a change its time for some adventure its time to put your lessons into actions!

Lord help me choose give me the strength to step out on faith!

from now on-and for the next few hundred years-the universe is going to help warriors of the light and hinder the prejudiced.

the earth's energy needs to be renewed

new ideas need space.

body and soul need new challenges.

the future has become the present, and every dream except those dreams that involve preconceived ideas will have a chance to be heard

anything of importance will remain; anything useless will disappear.

however, it is not the warrior's responsibility to judge the dreams of others, and he does not waste time criticising other people's decisions.

in order to have faith in his own path, he does not need to prove that someone else's path is wrong.

Lactose intolerance can really be toxic :P I decided yesterday to treat myself to some chocolate ice cream yesterday during lunch time (yum yum) Now I'm asking myself did I forget that I have a serious problem digesting milk in certain forms (which includes ice cream at the top of the list following yogurt, then some cheeses) Well, by 6pm I had become 8 months pregnant with serious stomach cramps putting me in an intolerable mood! I know my roommate if she was awake could here my random explosions relieving me of some weeks of pregnancy! LOL!! The pain was so bad I thought occasionally that I might have to visit the emergency room.

FYI I'm not pregnant!!!! Only when I eat dairy!

Glad to announce I made it through the night feeling like a brand new person this morning. Giving birth to volumes of Gas. I actually woke up feeling like I could swim around the world. My spirits are high and I feel blessed! :D

Not sure if I mentioned but I have started reading a new book eat, pray, love by Elizabeth Gilbert. Its about One Woman's search for everything across Italy, India and Indonesia. I fell in love with this book on page 16 (chapt 3) where she mentions

"Culturally, though not theologically, I'm a Christian. I was born a Protestant of the white Anglo-Saxon persuasion. And while I do love the great teacher of peace Who was called Jesus, and while I do reserve the right to ask myself in certain trying situations what indeed He would do, I can't swallow that one fixed rule of Christianity insisting that Christ is the only path to God. Strictly speaking, then, I cannot call myself a Christian. Most of the Christians I know don't speak very strictly. To those Who do speak (and think) strictly, all I can do here is offer my regrets for any hurt feelings and now excuse myself from their business."

Very brave of her to write this; something I agree with but find hard to express to  others when questioned. So I give her a huge hug for putting this into her book for being brave.

I'm very happy today, a dear friend from Bahrain is coming to Qatar today I haven't seen him in about 6 months, I value his friendship and I love talking with him. He has the warmest heart I can feel it by talking to him on the phone and sitting next to him.

So I have been avoiding mentioning this (weird saying and thinking about the battle I went through to finally go through with it but I have become a lacto-vegetarian (a person WHO eats only dairy products and vegetables) I still like to eat cheese, and some skim milk with my coffee  (my body finds a way to tolerate it, wine and cheese yum yum).

I'm still doing the online classes with Oprah and Eackhart Tolle and millions around the world A New Earth (at my own pace)  I giggle at times when I GET IT! Thank you Doug for telling me about this book.

Not too long ago on myspace Paulo Coelho asked a question on his blog My unfulfilled desires   "So, what are your "New Year" resolutions that you never ever managed to fulfill"? My answer is ~~I wouldn't say they are new years resolutions but they are resolutions (goals things that I want to accomplish in my life here as a Human Being) I guess I can't answer it yet; I still haven't got up the courage to express it to others (there is some shyness fear of rejection; I know I'm not getting any younger and I am not promised tomorrow but I still have a BUT........)

Well TTFN (tata for Now)

Love, light, and Blessings

Marie AKA Bright light Warrior Nika

Highlight for today are two things

Spiritual Riddle  

and a chat with a good friend here is the brief chat! I'm lady bug:

 hugs: he walked up on the roof to find me smoking a jay and sunbathing!
[16:03] lady bug: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
[16:03] lady bug: are you fucking serious
[16:04]  hugs: lol
[16:04]  hugs: hehehehe
[16:04] hugs: girl yes
[16:04]hugshugs: it was funny
[16:04] hugs: i was like, you didn't see this
[16:04] hugs: he was like nope, just reading my newspaper!
[16:04] hugs: lol
[16:05] lady bug: girl that made his day!!!!
[16:05]  hugs: lol
[16:05] hugs: i sent you that song death by chocolate
[16:05] hugs: its so pretty!
[16:05] lady bug: I read it I want her cd I am coming by today to pick it up!
[16:06]  hugs:
[16:06] lady bug: don't look like that!
[16:07] Giggles: you need to bring a blank cd
[16:07]  hugs: because the original doesn't leave my sight...ever
[16:08] lady bug: cool!

Oh Hallelujah, Oh glory, Oh holy of holies
Oh Bread of life God, Oh meat of hunger Lord
Water of thirst Lord, We magnify you
We thank You for what You've done God
What You¹re doing God and what You're gonna do
No matter who or what we are, we must praise
 

The Word Became Flesh

 1In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2He was with God in the beginning.

 3Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. 4In him was life, and that life was the light of men. 5The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood^[a] it.

 6There came a man who was sent from God; his name was John. 7He came as a witness to testify concerning that light, so that through him all men might believe. 8He himself was not the light; he came only as a witness to the light.

Just a thought from from the bible I had today! Still pondering on it!

Have a blessed day

Love and Light

Marie

first here is my update on the celibacy blog celibacy who me? yes Me! couldn’t be! well it seems; well all in all I click!

Moby has done it again I am loving his new album Last Night it rocks!  I got it off of 

i-Tunes this morning and rocked it on my way to work and yelled out-loud "Moby has done it again"! My favorite tracks are  #1 oo yeah #7hyenas and #8 im in love track #3  257.zero got me to thinking what was he thinking when he wrote this 257 123456789 zero~~~ ummmmm just a question that came to mind when listening to it. The entire CD flows~~~~~~~~~~I was imagining myself in London at a lounge spot talking with some friends listening and my body got to moving while i was talking and having a cocktail on the side. All in All thanks Moby for for this one!!! Love it!

Yesterday while walking from lunch with my friends a man (stranger) walks by and I stepped over his shadow I explain (confess to the first person ever) that I have this Phobia of stepping on other people's shadow. Yes, I know its crazy tried to google it but no help (can't believe that googling it didn't really help me usually google has all the answers LOL)

So while driving this morning I was thinking about my house (my mind, body, and spirit) and how its time to put things into order (every now and then you have to do a check up like those dental check up and doctor check ups) well I decided its time to have some fun with my energy and get things moving around and lined up, light and beautiful get that energy moving to make things work for me. Not sure if you are following what I'm saying but its the best way I can describe it.

By the way I woke up this morning with a huge amount of positive energy ( thank you Lord) I'm at ease and I'm happy! Umm no I'm not bi-polar only when PMS is around :D hehehehe

 Here is today's daily message

greatness

"Self-confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings." -Samuel Johnson (1709-1784)It all starts with us - right where we are. We have the capacity for greatness, we have the ability to achieve and accomplish whatever it is that we set out to do. But do we know this? Do we believe it? Do we act as if this is true? Or do we hesitate, procrastinate, or hedge our bets? We must be confident and forge ahead if we are going to get anywhere. And how far we go is simply a matter of how fast we move and how long we keep going!-Lissa Coffey Thought it lined up with my energy thing :DQuestion: What does learning mean: Accumulating Knowledge or transforming your life? (The Witch of Portobello)

Lord, I 'm going to be 30yrs old this year and i feel like i am wondering aimlessly in no particular direction without a real purpose.

I must admit more than often seems like i am struggling to see the beauty you have created in this world (at times i feel my eyes, my spirit is going blind to the miracles in life).

 This morning I did notice a small miracle that happens daily and that was the transition from night to day. I opened my eyes from a long restful sleep and noticed the sun shining through my window. I remembered before I closed my eyes how dark my rooms was and how all i could see out of my window was darkness.  The morning sun made me smile and I felt refreshed something had awakened in me something moved me.

thank you Lord for this refreshing miracle