There's an awkward young shadow that waits in the hall

He's cleared all his things and he's put them in boxes

Things that remind him: 'Life has been good'

Twenty-five years

He's worked at the paper

A man's here to take him downstairs

And I'm sorry, Mr. Jones

It's time

There was no party, there were no songs

'Cause today's just a day like the day that he started

Noone has left here that knows his first name

And life barrels on like a runaway train

Where the passengers change

They don't change anything

You get off; someone else can get on

And I'm sorry, Mr. Jones

It's time

Streetlight shines through the shades

Casting lines on the floor, and lines on his face

He reflects on the day

Fred gets his paints out and goes to the basement

Projecting some slides onto a plain white

Canvas and traces it

Fills in the spaces

He turns off the slides, and it doesn't look right

Yeah, and all of these bastards

Have taken his place

He's forgotten but not yet gone

And I'm sorry, Mr. Jones

And I'm sorry, Mr. Jones

And I'm sorry, Mr. Jones

It's time

This is a bunch of brown boxes.

There are 48 showing in this photo, but I assure you that I was told by someone who knows boxes that there are more of these same type of boxes behind the currently visible boxes.

The person did not elaborate much about the boxes, so going on that information alone, I would guess there are at least more than 50 boxes.   If I was a gambling man, which on occasion I am, I would say there are, at minimum 52 or more boxes.

If I wanted to be really crazy (and obviously I don't), I would go out on a limb and say there are at least...56 boxes.

Ooops!  Sorry to shake your mind up with that last bit of wild speculation on my part.  Let's just take it slow and say there are roughly 50 boxes, and potentially even more boxes than that!  Any possible number of boxes over our safely assumed 50 boxes would be a nice surprise.

Everyone likes surprises...right?

Isn't that a bit like saying, "people have a tendency to breathe (and it's the oxygen that ages them?)" Actually, he probably said 'high expectations', but some expectations are perfectly reasonable, and we founder upon them anyway.

A bit of advice I picked up from somewhere is that we should not attempt to change people. We shouldn't say "I'm going to tell him/her not to do that... it's for his/her own good." Just leave it alone. What was meant by that was that we shouldn't nag, or complain about the little things.

That's hard when you wish people were more aware, and more chatty when you would like a chat... not sort of dashing off saying "yes, very interesting," (or, worse), "that's not very good." It's hard to write about this without sounding like a moaner, which is probably why we're advised to keep quiet and not nag. It doesn't come across well – but it still has a lot to do with why people end the day under a cloud.

I'm from quite an undemonstrative family. No gushing, no hugging, no kissing. I never understood cousins who wanted to kiss me after not having seen me for months or years, and I never knew how to react. They didn't kiss me as children, so why did they start when they were in their late teens? The boys were the worst! I was embarrassed having to kiss one cousin's little boy goodnight when he toddled round all the adults at bedtime... I hadn't been brought up that way. Trouble is, I think being undemonstrative can be taken too far... it can get a little cold, a little supercilious.

When I was nineteen, I thought people had to keep their emotions in a little box... whether anger, sadness, or great enthusiasm. It would be awful to let anyone know you were actually feeling something! When I discovered that the world didn't stop spinning if you expressed how you actually felt, it was a huge relief in a way... but it still wasn't something that came naturally. I think growing up deaf (at any rate, deaf in a mainstream community) also does a lot to destroy natural expressiveness (but not the emotions). But that's a whole other ballgame and not what I meant to discuss here.

I got all excited when I read over that last paragraph and realized I had written about boxes! Oh, boxes! Last night I was appreciating another blogger's post, which was about people themselves being put in boxes. Other people put us in boxes, such as 'Rebel Without a Cause'. We either accept them or kick them away and climb into other boxes of our own. I'm not sure I ever labelled any of mine? Oh, I suppose I do... 'agoraphobic', 'dreamer', as well as others that I'm not sure I want to talk about -- sad, grey boxes; large, black angry boxes; furry talking boxes; damp, cold cardboard boxes tucked in the draughty bit behind the shed. (I was wondering why 'draughty' had a red line under it, and looked it up, and it said 'British spelling of 'drafty'. Also 'labelled' is British way of saying labeled. Sigh).

When I read that post, I thought, "why don't I blog about stuff like that? Instead I ramble about mundanities."

Well, I did blog about boxes, and I didn't have to think about it... it just happened!

[Beams].

Aren't you proud of me?

Anyway, I remember a friend who understood that I came from a 'no huggy, no kissy' family, unlike hers. One day she was seeing me off on a train... she helped me settle in with my bags, gave me a note to read when the train was on the move, then suddenly gave me a squeeze, and a peck on the cheek. While she grinned at me from the platform, I read the note... it said "I know you don't like emotional goodbyes, so I thought I would give you a hug at the last minute before getting off the train."

Funny, I had no objection to that one at all.

Dramatic, yes. But that statement never feels as true as it does when your whole life is contained in boxes in your parent's basement. Being in college, being in your 20's, it's all so....temporary. You're moving out (gradually), everything you own fits into the back of your Ford Escape, and no where you are ever feels like it's sticking for very long. All those short-lived part-time jobs stack up until you're not even putting them on your resume anymore, part-time turns into full-time turns into career, and even moving up usually means only a couple years of permanence, maybe a few if you're lucky.

Here's the thing, though: maybe temporary isn't good in the long run, but right now, when you're young and your whole life is ahead of you, sometimes it feels pretty damn good. Nothing to tie you down, a whole world of possibilities and opportunities at your fingertips - life feels like it stretches out in front of you, not behind. And yeah, maybe those boxes and bins won't ever quite get unpacked before they're back in your SUV again. But hey, the next time you're struggling to jam all those boxes into that trunk, at least you know they're headed down the road to bigger and better things.  Moving on will always be a whole lot better than getting stuck.  So maybe let's choose the temporary, after all.

Over my years as a professional musician, I've invested a phenomenal amount of money in musical gear. Amps, pedals, guitars, effects systems, you name it, I've probably bought it, beat it up, and traded it off in my search for "that sound."

After about 40 years of playing, I've arrived at the combination of analog and digital gear that presently outfits my studio, and a few choice instruments. I was pretty happy with this too, except it isn't very portable, and the setup is complex enough that there are times when I spend more time twiddling knobs than I do actually playing or recording.

Well, I've found something rather extraordinary. So much so I thought it was worth telling the world. As it turns out, there's an easy, sensible, cool way to go that costs very little and gives you the world. Here's the scoop.

[caption id="attachment_79" align="aligncenter" width="450" caption="Flying Haggis Interface"][/caption]
Hardware: M-Audio JAMLAB

This is a USB-connected guitar interface with a 24-bit guitar input and a stereo audio output. You plug it into a primary USB port (left hand side of the Macbook or Macbook Pro as the notebook faces you, or a front port on the Mac Pro - you can't run this through a hub, either internal to the Mac or elsewhere - too much data.)

Basically, you download the latest drivers from m-audio.com, install them, and the interface is ready to plug in and go for clean guitar input. Not that most of us are looking for such a thing. More on that in a bit.

I got my JAMLAB some time ago for about $60 at thinkgeek.com; It came with software called "GT Player Express", the latest version of which is called "InTone Guitar Express (and Pro) which is, in my musical opinion, not very good. Nor is the upgraded version, intone Guitar Pro, which I also bought, any better. The current release as I write this has a relatively simplistic view of what an "amp" is, and some of the stompbox emulations simply don't work. But not to worry. This software isn't what you want to use anyway, though it is there if you decide to try it.

Software: Flying Haggis (No, really -- that's what it's called.)

This comes with quite a few stompbox emulations, and they are excellent -- I'll come back to them. But the most important thing here is that the amplifier and speaker cabinet emulations are nothing less than superb. You want a little blues amp? It's in there, and it sounds right. You want a Marshal stack? It's in there, and it is right. The range of preset emulations is outstanding, and you can tweak any one of them in a number of very, very cool ways. You have an early stage gain, a distortion control, compression, cabinet emulation, cabinet miking and a master output level -- all of which can be varied from the preset amp settings or from custom ones.

So once you've got the amp sounding just the way you want it to, you can save it under a new name, and it's a permanently available setup. This is just primo, and though that may sound over-excited to you, it sounds not excited enough to me. That's just how good the amp and speaker emulations are. You can even control the mike placement in front of the amp. Did I mention this thing sounds absolutely, unbelievably primo? Well, it does.

The stompboxes extend the fabulous sound into the usual areas, but they do so with the same quality as the amplifier emulations. You get a noise gate [threshold] (which you will use with some of the high gain amps);

You get an auto-wah [depth / speed / tone], which does a very credible job of keeping up with heated leads or mournful picking;

You get a phaser [depth / speed / tone], which goes from flange to gentle wash with authority;

You get a tremolo [depth / speed] which does just what you'd expect, just as you'd want it to;

You get an Echo [time / feedback / width / mix] which serves as a quiet, studio quality system (though one thing you can't make it do, as near as I can tell, is make it act like an old Echoplex... it's too clean for that.)

And you get a Chorus [depth / speed / mix] which again, is ultra-clean and does just what you'd want.

Up on the amp system, there's a Reverb -- just a single control, seems to do just the right thing. Initially I thought I'd be wanting more control such as how deep the room was, how hard the surface, but as it turns out, this thing acts just right and I have no complaints.

Flying Haggis is $99, however, they're perfectly happy to let you try it for free without anything disabled. So you should do that!

One sour note: Flying Haggis is copy protected, so you are at risk to some degree if they go out of business. They claim otherwise, but frankly, if you don't have control over the software, you're at risk and there's no way around that fact.

Having said that, I say buy it anyway. It's that good. They've let me authorize the software for my main desktop, a Mac Pro, and my laptop, a Macbook pro; no extra charges, no delays, easily done. The copy protection is a little annoying to get going, authorization requires one more step than usual, but once done, it hasn't bothered me any further.

Playing Out

Now, this system is the type of thing that doesn't need a guitar amp. What it needs is a wideband, high-fidelity amp and speakers. That's important. If you feed this combination to (for instance) a Fender Twin, then *everything* will sound like it's being pumped through a... yeah, a Fender Twin. In order for things to work as well as possible, you're going to want a few hundred watts per channel stereo amplifier, and two wide-range PA-class speakers.

You doubt me, I know, but you'll see. The system does *not* use the amp or the speakers to color tone; if you try to do that yourself, you'll severely limit the type and quality of sound you can produce. An easy way to convince yourself is to plug in a pair of stereo headphones into the JAMLAB output and play. Those headphones are wideband, right? Now listen to the various amps. Each one has a totally different character. You will lose that character if you use, for instance, a Marshall cabinet or a Fender head.

Garage Band

You can plug Flying Haggis right into Garage Band, too; which gives you recording and solo-oriented jamming capability immediately. It's just a very well integrated, ultra-high quality experience from start to finish.

Summing Up

I am deliriously happy with this setup. I play jazz, blues, rock, metal, classical and folk; everything I want is right at my fingertips. Perfect. I just drag my laptop, a stereo amp, and a couple speakers out, and I'm good. Aside from the Mac, amp and speakers, the outlay is about $160 in total, which is a screaming bargain for what you get. I highly, totally, ultimately and without quibbling recommend this setup. If it weren't for the copy protection, I'd rate it stone perfect.

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For the next 3 days, I'm going to enjoy my last days in the UK. Oh how time flies..

1. How many carloads did it take us to bring our stuff to the storage locker prior to the start of the basement renovations? Because it seems that it is taking FAR longer to bring the stuff back. And many more carloads than I remember...
2. Why do we have so much stuff?
3. Why do we pay someone else rent to store stuff we don't even remember owning?
4. Why do we (he) keep a box full of old computer game we don't have time to play?
5. Where are we going to store the stuff we intend to keep once we bring it home? The new closets are mostly already full.
6. Why are we storing stuff at all? If we don't need it or want it or if it stays in a box anyway, why keep it at all?
7. Would it make sense to throw out/donate/sell/give away/burn all seasonal clothing and buy new stuff every single time the season changes instead of storing stuff? (the answer can only be no since we don't own a money tree, but it sure is tempting)
8. On that note, why do I have 3 bins full of Xmas stuff? And another one of Halloween/Thanksgiving and Easter stuff? Do I decorate with this stuff? I don't remember...

Plan today:

Unload the car on the front lawn. Unpack all the bins and boxes. Make 3 piles:

• keep and store or display or use
• leave on the lawn for anyone to take
• throw in the garbage/recycling

This one still puzzles me. It was the first picture of the boxed items that I took. Somehow, I have saved a Taco Bell receipt from August 19, 1991. Somehow, I wrapped said Taco Bell receipt around a group of baseball cards. From different years and different companies. Along with Upper Deck Looney Tunes cards.

The cards don’t have any pattern. It’s not like they are from a strat team or an early rotisserie team. (I’d hope I didn’t have Karl “Tuffy” Rhodes, Marvell Wynne, Mark Thurmond and Bob Brower as the core of any team.) Only Rex Hudler kind of makes sense as he was a Cardinals favorite as they suffered through the early 90s. I loved the Wonder Dog. He still makes me smile with his unbridled enthusiasm for the game as an Angels announcer.

I could understand the receipt if it was for two bean burritos with extra onions. You see, that was my special signal to Jimmy Fessler that I was at the drive thru of the Taco Bell on Providence in Columbia, MO and hungry. (Not an uncommon condition. Even today. Except for the Columbia, MO part. Still, I can always make room for Shakespeare’s Pizza when I drive through Columbia.)

Jimmy would peer out the window, confirm it was me, laugh to himself, and then make two of the fattest bean burritos you would ever want to see.* I had a burrito that crunched once because of the number of onions. I didn’t have a date that……year, so it was all good.

* I love the things that we do in college to save money, legal and illegal. Two bean burritos, and from the receipt we know that would only be about a buck and a quarter with tax, and I would be full for the night. However, I still can’t believe I ever willingly drank King Kobra malt liquor. I can believe I tried to steal a keg from a dorm party once. Somehow the hosts spotted a big silver keg “hidden” in the middle of a field.

But, the date tells me it was the year before I met Jimmy. So, almost seventeen years after I went to Taco Bell store number 456, I still have a receipt to commemorate that experience. One good thing – I know it couldn’t have been a date, because I only got one large Mountain Dew. I doubt even I would be that cheap to buy one drink and share it with my date. Or, for heaven’s sake, to take a date to Taco Bell, unless I had some wonderfully overdeveloped sense of chutzpah that day.

Unless we went dutch. Damn, that would be good. Let’s just pretend that’s it. Balls. Big as church bells. Taking a date to Taco Bell and going dutch. Then going to the lake in Capaha Park and feeding the ducks the leftover soft taco scraps. Maybe catching a free baseball game at Capaha Field. Then climbing the fence to sneak into Capaha pool after hours. Going to Kidd’s afterwards and buying baseball cards and giving the cool cards to my date. A bouquet of all-stars which would be so much better than flowers. The ultimate cheap date if you know you’re already in like Flynn. Yes, and I saved the receipt and the leftover cards to prove I was that damn good.

Otherwise, it’s just a Taco Bell receipt.

I wonder if they are cold

My skin is burning in comparison

Boxes block up like legoes near my door

Single trunk stands out among the brown

More free than lonely

You'd be suprised.

Peace, Jill

(please note I scanned negatives to see if you could see them not to be smart!)

(Thank you) x.

today is leigh's birthday. this is the box i made for her, it's filled with everything sweet and tear-provoking. she loved it and giggled and i'm glad.

July '08

I'm continuing my pick up of plastic bottles when I walk or run. Tonight, I picked up three off the streets of the Riverwalk and Lexington Point subdivisions. I'll total the number of bottles I pick up at the end of the summer. Now this isn't an organized clean up. I just do a walk and pick up as many plastic bottles as I can carry. And these aren't my bottles.

Please, let's keep plastic out of the waterways.

Well anyways, I've realized that you never really know how much stuff you've got until you have to pack it all. I totally just finished filling two large boxes full of "stuff", and then looked around the room only to be unable to tell that anything was missing.

Some people might say that that means I don't need any of that stuff. And some people would be wrong (as, aside from my extensive animal-shaped dish-and-tea-set collection, I also packed away such valuable items as: candles --which I actually dislike with some passion, but they're alright for when the power's out--, matches-- to light aforementioned candles, you can see how I couldn't possibly go without!--, about 62 coasters-yes, so I spill things sometimes, but seriously I doubt if two people and a cat need 62 of 'em--, and other charmers like that).

You see? All necessary. As, I imagine I will find out, are the multitude of loose batteries I found (and collected) floating around a myriad of drawers throughout the apartment. Where exactly these batteries belong, and even if they work, are mysteries best left for a day when I have a bit more energy.

Meanwhile, why would I be cleaning, you ask? After all, aren't we just about to move anyways, making a spic and span space a bit of an unnecessary thing? No no. The apartment must be shown... the apartment must be rented out to some other unsuspecting soul(s). Therefore, the apartment must be sweptvaccuumedwasheddustedfoldedsprayedwindexedpackedtidied into an illusion of order. Then the potential renters will come in and say: "Ah! This space is clean; this space is tidy. I can imagine myself living in such a clean & tidy space." And presto! Sold!

(Despite the obvious and overlooked fact that the clean & tidy space will only stay so if he/she/they keep up the mad cleaning.)

I love clean & tidy spaces myself, only it's so much easier when someone else is doing the cleaning and tidying. The astonished kitten seems to like the extra space, although the poor thing runs when she hears the vaccuum. Which, of course, is very often. Twice a day, in fact.*

*If by day, you mean month. hee.

Don't forget -- there are two more prizes coming up! One big one and one really big one -- please add the app, play the game, and then check out the Facebook Group and the Facebook Page! The game ends on July 14th!

Don't forget -- there are two more prizes coming up! One big one and one really big one -- please add the app, play the game, and then check out the Facebook Group and the Facebook Page! The game ends on July 14th!