I love them!!!! Well, her! She's pretty, sort of.

Rebecca Romijn and Jerry O'Connell have announced they will be parents of twins soon!!  So wonderful happy babies from pretty people!  Joy! :)

Approximately 70% (66% to be more precise) of single black women are raising children. A disheartening 50% of these single black mothers live in poverty, and if one lives in poverty it is very likely that they will stay in poverty. This is increasingly becoming more of the rule than it is the exception. Soledad O'Brien's Black in America  Part 1  on CNN only confirmed what I have always known and that is that the children of single parent households generally  follow in their parents’ footsteps, or shadows  when it comes to the absent father.

Black children who grow up in single parent households are more likely to:

• Go to jail (mostly males): It’s no secret that many young, black men are incarcerated.
• Get pregnant at an early age/Become “Baby Mommas”: With no father figure around, a lot of them go looking for a father figure and the love of a father that they never really had. Despite some women's best efforts for their daughter not to make the same mistake she made, this seems to be the trend, especially for young girls whose mother had them at an early age.
• Become “Baby Daddies”:  Considering this is, more or less, what his father did to his mother, this is the example his father set for his son by default.
• Drop out of school: Nearly 50% of black students drop out of school and never graduate.
• Join a gang (mostly males): 80% of black males who join gangs are those who have no father figure in the household. A lot of them look up to “OGs” or Original Gangsters as father figures. The OG is merely his name’s sake, and only cares about increasing his money through drugs and elimination of his competition through murder----enter the young black troubled mind looking for a fatherly figure.
• Get caught up in drugs: A lot of the black men in jail are there because of drug-related crimes. Murder, rape, and theft are also reasons.

The other side of this is some children know the mistakes their parents made and want to avoid them at all cost so that they can have a better life and future for themselves and family, however, statistics show that these are a small minority.

I am reminded of my two small cousins, one is 1 ½ and the other is 2 ½ ---both are girls. Of course, I only want the best for both of them but I fear for them that they may very well following their mother’s footsteps or linger in their father’s shadow. God knows I pray that they are a part of that small minority and that the minority one day becomes the majority.

Now...why were/are some people mad at Barack and Cosby again?

About a week or 2 ago I started praying. I asked God to send me a man, and I listed every quality known to man that I thought he should have. Now this list has been tweaked over time cuz before I was leaving ish out and well that didn't go so well most days lol. But this list I was sure I had down packed. So a few days later I get an email and here is what it said

" Wow hi you are a hard person to find!! I have been looking for you for about 3 or 4 years. I hope you rember me I worked with you a while ago. Well I am looking forward to talking to you hopefully soon!!!!"

There was a picture beside it and when I clicked on it I thought?? hmmm do I know this dude, stalker perhaps??. He didn't say where exactly, so I attempt to remember every fine dude at work cuz u know ya girl won't let a sexy sexy slip away so fast with passing me first lol. So I spent about 1 hour trying to recall every job in my life and it hit me like a 1 year old throwing his sippy cup going straight for my head!!!! WALLY WORLD!!! yes!!! I meet J at walmart.

J was a cool kat, rather dorky in my opinion but cool. We kicked it with each other on a regular basis for the short time I spent there but never on a serious tip. I honestly thought nothing of it back then, I was all of 22 or 23 trying to stay above water on bills. So almost 3 years later J finds me and we spent the next few days talking about whats been going on. I found myself opening up to him about everything and he was extremly calm and understanding about my situation. He also went on to inform me that all this time he has been looking for me, asking around to see if anybody knew me. Well I don't hang in lansing so that odds of anybody knowing me would be 1 in a million. I was taken back that he was trying to find me and felt a bit flattered............. so the story goes on.

Since that day me and J have been in communication. We had 2 rather fun dates and we talk every day now. He is the sweetest guy. On the scale of attraction he is definantly not ugly, tall (6'3) a lil skinnier than most, caramel completion, and glasses, kinda still has the dorkiness to him but nothing that can't be worked on with a couple new outfits. He opened ALL of my car doors on the dates and footed the bills and didnt ask for ass in return lol. To me thats a BIG step from the norm lol. The other big thing about him was that he talked about the exact same financial goals and opinions as me, about being frugal, and spending less money, the man is even almost done paying off his house! I mean I really couldn't have asked for him to sound much better than he did...... (deep sigh of relief)

So you ask why am I conflicted?? Well because sometimes tho I AM not a bible thumper. I can be extremely spiritual (got it from mom) I always analyze if something is of God or if its the devil playing tricks on my mind. I was thinking like maybe its another one of the devils tricks to get me off track, my mind went pretty crazy from there. I was able to talk to my best friend and she was very insightful, she told me only time will tell whats to come of this and she was right. So I am trying to play it cool and not get caught up in what may or may not be. Also J has 2 kids (Same mom) But I remember asking God for a man with NO kids, so why would he give me a man with 1 let alone 2??? I know there is a reason for everything and even tho no kids was on my deal breaker list, I had to remember why and that was because i had a fear that the guy wasnt taking care of them. J actually has custody of both children and the man worked his ass off to get them which says TO ME a lot about the type of guy he is (when it comes to taking responsibility for them that is). Who knows maybe I can look past the children?? I just don't know about all this.

I do know I am over such n such from the last post!!!!! I believe God sends people in your life for a reason. So J why are you here????

On with new things!!!

Low

I received the following text message:

Happy Non-Fathers day. Congrats on making it another year without having a baby's mama. Keep it pimpin playa

I want you to know my cell phone def got the side eye off of this message...

like...isn't father's day the day in which we acknowledge those who actually have taken their responsibility of the male contributor to an individuals life? So why demean this day with such tomfoolery?! Like I hate it when black people insist on setting us back...happy non father's day...scoff

Like really...if you are really that concerned about not having a baby mama...try celibacy...

and before I step off of my soap box...

I think I dont like the fact that there are father's day cards for single moms. Like really...your work is appreciated as a mother...but dude...you such a mom...like...your not a dad...like the only way I'd consider giving a woman a fathers day card is if her child calls her dommy or maddy...but until then...dude...ur day is and will only be mothers day...stop trying to take my future day!

high

Phone rings:

Doc: Hello

ST: [mouth pop] hell low

D: hey ST...whats good?

ST: uh uhhhhhhh this is Shaquanetta...and I'm calling you today to get my child support

D: [robust laughter ensues]

ST: I don't know why u is laughing. I need to know when yo black azz is going to give me my money to support our child [giggles]

D: [robust laughter continues]

Yes...I realize this conversation sets us back too...but...it was funny...where as that text was tasteless

...I may be a hypocrite [shrugs]

But, he got a baby momma and he don't love Janice.  Besides, John the Baptist said he knocked the bottom outta that shit! Janice is a 'hoe!

Alex Koppleman, Salon, June 11, 2008

An alert reader wrote in just a little while ago to let us know about something he'd spotted on Fox News Wednesday afternoon. During a segment discussing conservative attacks against Michelle Obama, the wife of presumptive Democratic nominee Barack Obama, the network described the former as "Obama's baby mama."

I checked, and sure enough our e-mailer was right. In fact, that description was displayed on screen several times during the segment, which featured anchor Megyn Kelly and conservative blogger Michelle Malkin, an FNC contributor.

Read More and See the Video Here

Saw this movie last night, and it wasn't too bad.  Story goes like this: High-class business woman wants child, woman is infertile, hires surrogate mother, hilarity ensues.

There's definitely a lot of cute moments in the movie, and I wouldn't really label it as a chick flick, but it's very close.  If you're thinking of dragging your boyfriend/husband to the theatres, they probably wouldn't mind watching it, and there's lots of comic relief from the token black guy too.

7/10.  Nothing special, but a good movie anyways.

I felt like sharing some things that disturbed my spirit this week. You may laugh or hang your head in shame, but it is what it is.

1. My mom was playing with my friend the 3-year old son at church. He had a little car and some of the dolls from our church’s nursery. He said “I’m going to put the daddy in the car, and the baby.” My mom, playing along with him asked, “Are they ready to go?” But he screamed “Wait… I forgot to put the ‘baby momma’ in the car too!”

Not a wife, not the mommy, not even the girlfriend, he saw a female doll and called it a “baby mama.’ I laughed and shook my head in shame at the same time.

2. I was driving my grandmother to the doctor’s office and saw a woman with a little kid holding a sign. My first instinct was to question why this woman had her kid of school in the middle of the day for a fundraiser (he looked about 6 years old). But when I read the sign it said “Donations, need money to bury father”. Then I looked at the other corners and saw about 6 more kids holding signs saying the same thing.

I was so disturbed for a number of reasons. a) if this is a scam, using the kids is dirty even for scammers. b) if this is the truth, then how sad is it that this family can’t afford to bury him, and that the kids have to stand on the corner waiting for hand outs in order to put their dad in the ground? c) Whether or not this is a scam all them kids missed school to be little grifters for the day.
This truly disturbed my spirit.

12 minutes ago it was Wednesday, and that means it warrants my hot pick. Sorry I've been caught in the library bullshitting my way through an unnecessarily long paper.

So, have you been having Baby Mama DrAmA?

What happens when you combine Tina Fey and Amy Pohler in a movie. History has proven you get amazing hillarious comedies. Despite the fact that some of the audience members laughed like heienas (spelling) during mating seating, the movie was still enjoyable. Although, its not the witch-cackling audience members fault she laughed so far, moreover its the movies fault about the laughter. Baby Mama is about the relationship between a surrogate mother and the adoptive mother, it has the natural quality of humor about it. Warning, baby mama, is a little predictable plot-wise. To make you understand how predictable Baby Mama is, I predicted what was going to happen in the end of the movie by the early middle. It has some aspects of romantic comedy. I know I said somewhere if I saw another romantic comedy I would shoot myself, well, obviously that was a lie, so don't come approaching me with a gun because of my melodramatic comments. Despite the fact there was a love interest and two characters falling in love it still had the nice not overacted comedy needed for movies. I find it interesting that pregnancy is starting to become a concept of humor, I wonder how many more pregnant comedies I will see in 2008.

Ever wonder why all those men on the Maury show do cartwheels, somersaults, backflips, splits, and end-zone like celebrations when the host Maury Povich announces the results of DNA-paternity tests?

Well, here's an article that may interest you.  In Monday's NY Daily News, Queens mother Chandra Myers is suing two (former?) employers of her ex-husband Robert Sean Myers for $8 million!  She charges that they didn't garnish his wages for child support.

After reading the article, I surmise that there HAS to be more to the story.  All I know is this, Robert Sean Myers claims to make close to $1600 a month, and that $611 of his wages go to this woman already.(!!!)  The man has one child with this woman, while he has FIVE other children to support!!! 

Robert Sean Myers says, "I have no problem supporting my kids, Just let me work and pay it off.  She doesn't want child support from me.  She wants me to go to jail.  Who benefits?  Our daughter?  My other five children?"

What a mess.  The employers being sued are Sara Lee Bakeries and Bimbo Bakeries USA Inc.  Wonder how they feel?

--The Wow Jones Report

I got this text from a good friend of mine - and after the laughter subsided...I did have to look at this random text...and think: is it possible to successfully date someone with a pre-made family?

What are your thoughts?

...and one more

would you date someone who has had curable std(s)?

I lied...one more

would you date someone who has had multiple abortions?

I felt a few taps on my back, then suddenly I would hear a seductive voice in my ear, “Would you like a dance?”I look back momentarily to catch a glimpse at the young woman, and my eyes would instantly catch her flirtatious smile and the twiddling of her braided hair.

“No thank you,” I replied.

 “So what are you here for if you aren’t getting any dances?” she asked.  

“Just here for the experience—“

“So can I just sit down and chat with you for a few”

“Sure—“

Not a second after she took her seat she began asking questions, the usual, where me and my homeboy were from, was this our first time, etc. We answered them all, shot a few back, and then sat quietly-gazing on at the show as did the rest of the room. As I glanced back her way her profile caught my attention. I asked myself, why would such a seemingly sweet girl get caught up in something like this? After a few minutes of pondering to myself, I decided to ask her directly.  I unleashed a barrage of questions onto her, and she had no problem answering them: How did you get into this? Do you get nervous? How do you feel about your image? Again she gladly answered them, and the overall impression I received from her answers was that she was a single mother, who is doing whatever she feels she has to in order to take care of her child.

We continued in conversation for quite some time, and before she left I would offer her ten dollars for her time, because I knew in her profession- time literally is money. She thanked me and asked,

“Are you sure you don’t want a dance?”

“I’m sure, but thanks”

The whole night my arms were between my legs, with my hands locked. An unconscious gesture I used to subliminally let the young ladies know that I was in an uncomfortable situation, and was definitely not about to accept a dance. It didn’t work so well in the effect of warding them off, they came like unrelenting flies and rejecting them was more uncomfortable than sitting there. For that short hour or so I felt the pain of an attractive woman, constantly being chased by unwanted men.

After the second time I turned down her offer, she leaned back as if she had been caught off guard. She looked me squarely in the eyes, and I could see that what was behind them had changed. She no longer saw green when she looked at me, she saw potential: Potential to have someone who wouldn’t judge her, potential for a father for her child, potential for freedom from a place that demands her to turn her body into a commodity.

“Let me give you my number,” she says.

I smiled in acceptance, and took it down.

“Don’t forget about me!”

“I won’t—“with a wink and a smile as she walked away.

For the next few minutes or so I direct my attention back to the ladies of the night, and notice something strangely identical with the most of them. It was their eyes, they all looked as though they were in space, as if for the moment they were selling themselves they were lost within themselves. I came to the realization that I wasn’t looking at the women themselves, but bodies on auto-pilot, self-taught to put away its surroundings, dance a routine, and collect money. This they must do, or their own shame would be the murder of their soul.

“You ready to go dawg?”

“Yea man lets go see about ol’ girl first, she dancin’ on stage—”

She caught my eyes in delight as we walked by, and I gave her a smile as we stood before the stage. After a few moments she went into auto-pilot and started her usual routine. She bent over in front of us, but I kept my eyes on hers. She looked back to me, and caught my eyes once more, but this time I noticed something different. Her eyes began to tell me something different. At that moment she knew that she would never hear from me again, that I would never pick up the phone to call. I saw the sadness in her face, not necessarily because i wouldn’t call, but because of where she was in life-a single mother of an eight month old child and on stage stripping for money. She was sad because she felt low, like I wouldn’t call because I was better than her. But with my eyes I told her no human can justly say that they are better than the other,  and I am certainly no better than you, who am I to judge? I wish you the best out of life, and the best of luck.